Thursday, 30 December 2010

This Matters More Than Money

What really matters
As we come to the end of the year, many people are suffering from the pain of Christmas debt. Others are troubled with the upheavals of the financial markets. Let me remind you of the words of Jesus: "A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." If you understand that truth it will change your life forever.

Real satisfaction is found not in money, but in loving relationships with God, our spouse, children, and friends. Loving relationships are our greatest assets. Most of us could live with less money, and may of necessity have to do so. But, if that helps us focus on relationships, then we still come out winners. Why not have a family 'soup' night - eat only soup and crackers and thank God that you are alive and together.

Do you ever wonder what we did before computers?
I think we played games. I think we had meals together and talked about what was going on in our lives. I think husbands and wives made love, and children felt secure. I think fathers and sons threw the ball in the back yard. I think mothers and daughters made doll dresses. I think we had families.

Softening up students to Islam with History syllabus

Commentary

Written by Centre for Policy Initiatives
Wednesday, 29 December 2010
Whose history is the government pushing on our students and to what effect?
On Oct 23, Education Minister Muhyiddin Yassin announced that History will be made a must-pass subject for the Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia beginning 2013. This puts the subject on par with Bahasa Malaysia in its degree of importance.
The ministry will introduce a revised SPM History curriculum in 2017 as in that year the cohort which started Form One in 2013 would have reached Form Five. Fresh elements to be incorporated when the History syllabus begins its new cycle are ‘patriotism’, ‘citizenship’ and ‘the constitution’, which by extension implicates the so-called social contract.
Muhyiddin said the reason for the move to expand the History syllabus is so that patriotism can be instilled in Malaysian youths.
On Dec 16 – responding to objections raised by some quarters on his proposal – Muhyiddin guaranteed that the government does not have any “ulterior motives” and reiterated that the government in its decision “only want to introduce a history education to appreciate [patriotism] to help them [the Fifth Formers] become more patriotic”.

Tuesday, 28 December 2010

Advice on Stepfamilies

Stepfamilies face many challenges. Taking a group of total strangers and throwing them together and expecting them to get along is chock full of problems. These stepfamilies are often called “blended families”, but there’s nothing blended about most of them. They tend to be more like two opposing armies lined up for battle than anything that can even remotely be referred to as “blended”.  Just ask most couples who have blended and families about their experience and you will probably hear the word “hell” in about 60 seconds.

My best advice to those who are considering remarriage with children from previous marriages: wait. Just hang on, trust God during this time and wait until the kids are grown—and even then it still isn’t a guarantee! Sometimes even adult children will have a difficult time with their parent’s remarriage situation. But generally those who wait until the kids are out of the house have much less trouble and way fewer problems.

If, however, you choose to go into the stepfamily situation, know that it’s going to be a very rough road to travel.  You will have to deal with each other’s children, the ex-spouses, the multiple sets of grandparents, complicated holiday and summer schedules, etc.  Again, in my opinion the best thing you can do is to wait until the kids are all out of the house and then move on to a new relationship.

continued here

Sunday, 26 December 2010

2 Jan 2011

Caleb R.

Terry C
Shankar R., Hong Lu, Foong Yee

Meng Fhui, Jocelyn Lee
Ken Fhui, Weng Ern
Jaemy C .

Moses Tan

Hiew, Tommy Q.

Saturday, 25 December 2010

Sunday Sermon 25-Dec-2010 - Pastor Gurmit Sigh

Speaker: Pastor Gurmit Sigh
Grace Assembly Petaling Jaya

http://www.mediafire.com/?s326l8u7kd7qu5k

12th day of Christmas: Go tell it on the mountain

Go tell it on the mountain, Over the hills and everywhere,
Go tell it on the mountain, Our Jesus Christ is born.

When I was a seeker I sought both night and day,
I asked the Lord to help me, And he showed me the way.

He made me a watchman Upon a city wall,
And if I am a Christian, I am the least of all.




The words and lyrics of the spiritual Christmas Carol 'Go tell it to the Mountain 'are by John W. Work, Jr. (1872-1925). John Work was famous for Folk Songs of the American Negro in Nashville, Tennessee in 1907. He graduated from Fisk University in 1898 and became a teacher. He died on September 7th 1925 in Nashville, the same town he was born in.
Our grateful thanks goes to Eric Halstead for giving his kind permission to play his self sequenced midi file of this superb piano rendition of this Christmas Carol.

Friday, 24 December 2010

11th day of Christmas: The First Noel

The First Noel, the Angels did say Was to certain poor shepherds in fields as they lay
In fields where they lay keeping their sheep On a cold winter's night that was so deep.

Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel Born is the King of Israel!

They looked up and saw a star Shining in the East beyond them far
And to the earth it gave great light And so it continued both day and night.

And by the light of that same star Three Wise men came from country far
To seek for a King was their intent And to follow the star wherever it went.

This star drew nigh to the northwest O'er Bethlehem it took its rest
And there it did both Pause and stay Right o'er the place where Jesus lay.

Then entered in those Wise men three Full reverently upon their knee
And offered there in His presence Their gold and myrrh and frankincense.

Then let us all with one accord Sing praises to our heavenly Lord
That hath made Heaven and earth of nought And with his blood mankind has bought.




The First Noel is unknown in origin but is generally thought to be English dating back to the sixteenth century. There is a misconception that the First Noel was French and it is believed that this is because of the French spelling of Noel as opposed to the olde English Anglo-Saxon spelling of the word as in Nowell. After England was captured by the Normans numerous words were adopted from the Norman French language and Noel was re-spelt as Nowell, early printed versions of this carol use the Nowell spelling. The First Noel was first published in 1833 when it appeared in "Christmas Carols Ancient and Modern," a collection of seasonal carols gathered by William B. Sandys.

Thursday, 23 December 2010

10th day of Christmas: O come, O come, Emmanuel

O come, O come, Emmanuel And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here Until the Son of God appear

Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free Thine own from Satan's tyranny
From depths of Hell Thy people save And give them victory o'er the grave

O come, Thou Day-Spring, come and cheer Our spirits by Thine advent here
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night And death's dark shadows put to flight.

O come, Thou Key of David, come, And open wide our heavenly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high, And close the path to misery.

O come, O come, Thou Lord of might, Who to Thy tribes, on Sinai's height,
In ancient times did'st give the Law, In cloud, and majesty and awe.




The favourite O Come, O Come Emmanuel carol was originally written in Latin text in the 12th Century. The author of the words and composer to the music of O Come, O Come Emmanuel is unknown. It is , however believed that the melody was of French origin and added to the text a hundred years later. The Latin was translated into English by John Mason Neale in 1851.

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

9th day of Christmas: Angels from the realms of glory

Angels from the realms of glory, Wing your flight o'er all the earth;
Ye who sang creation's story, Now proclaim Messiah's birth:

Come and worship, Come and worship,
Worship Christ, the newborn King!

Shepherds, in the fields abiding, Watching o'er your flocks by night,
God with man is now residing, Yonder shines the infant Light;

Sages, leave your contemplations, Brighter visions beam afar;
Seek the great desire of nations, Ye have seen His natal star;

Saints before the altar bending, Watching long in hope and fear,
Suddenly the Lord, descending, In His temple shall appear:




The author of Angels From the Realms of Glory was an Irishman called James Montgomery. He came from a religious family background and sadly his parents, who were missionaries died following their vocation. Angels From the Realms of Glory was written in 1816. The music for Angels From the Realms of Glory was composed by Henry Smart. The lyrics of Angels From the Realms of Glory tell the story of the shepherds, sages and Saints.

Waiting Forwardly: A Day to Anticipate

by Max Lucado

“Now in Jerusalem there was a man named Simeon. He was an upright and devout man; he looked forward to Israel’s comforting and the Holy Spirit rested on him”
(Luke 2:25 TKB, emphasis mine).

Let’s take a look at Simeon, the man who knew how to wait for the arrival of Christ. The way he waited for the first coming is a model for how we should wait for the Second Coming.

“The Holy Spirit had revealed to him that he would not die until he had seen him—God’s anointed King” (v. 26 TLB).

You’ve got to wonder what a message like that would do to a person. What does it do to you if you know you will someday see God? We know what it did to Simeon.

Tuesday, 21 December 2010

8th day of Christmas

Away in a manger, No crib for His bed
The little Lord Jesus Laid down His sweet head
The stars in the bright sky Looked down where He lay
The little Lord Jesus Asleep on the hay

The cattle are lowing The poor Baby wakes
But little Lord Jesus No crying He makes
I love Thee, Lord Jesus Look down from the sky
And stay by my side, 'Til morning is nigh.

Be near me, Lord Jesus, I ask Thee to stay
Close by me forever And love me I pray
Bless all the dear children In Thy tender care
And take us to heaven To live with Thee there



Away in a manager is always the first carol that children are taught. Away in a Manger was originally published in 1885. The publication of Away in a Manger was in a Lutheran Sunday school book and this created the misconception that the lyrics of Away in a Manger were actually written by Martin Luther himself. The author is unknown. The music to Away in a Manger was composed by William J. Kirkpatrick in 1895.

Monday, 20 December 2010

7th day of Christmas

Hark the herald angels sing " Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on earth and mercy mild God and sinners reconciled"
Joyful, all ye nations rise Join the triumph of the skies
With the angelic host proclaim: "Christ is born in Bethlehem"

Hark! The herald angels sing "Glory to the newborn King!"

Christ by highest heav'n adored Christ the everlasting Lord!
Late in time behold Him come Offspring of a Virgin's womb
Veiled in flesh the Godhead see Hail the incarnate Deity
Pleased as man with man to dwell Jesus, our Emmanuel

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace! Hail the Son of Righteousness!
Light and life to all He brings Ris'n with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by Born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth Born to give them second birth




“Hark the herald angels sing” Christmas Carol was written by Charles Wesley, brother of John Wesley founder of the Methodist church, in 1739. A sombre man, he requested slow and solemn music for his lyrics and thus “Hark the herald angels sing” was sung to a different tune initially. Over a hundred years later Felix Mendelssohn (1809-1847) composed a cantata in 1840 to commemorate Johann Gutenberg's invention of the printing press. English musician William H. Cummings adapted Mendelssohn’s music to fit the lyrics of “Hark the herald angels sing” already written by Wesley.

Sunday, 19 December 2010

Sunday Sermon 19-Dec-2010 - Bro. Caleb Ramachandran

Speaker: Bro. Caleb Ramachandran
White Fields Assembly Seremban

http://www.mediafire.com/?crz3uewlvi5rw3o

6th day of Christmas

It came upon the midnight clear, That glorious song of old,
From angels bending near the earth, To touch their harps of gold:
"Peace on the earth, goodwill to men From heavens all gracious King!"
The world in solemn stillness lay To hear the angels sing.

Still through the cloven skies they come, With peaceful wings unfurled;
And still their heavenly music floats O'er all the weary world:
Above its sad and lowly plains They bend on hovering wing,
And ever o'er its Babel sounds The blessed angels sing.

O ye beneath life's crushing load, Whose forms are bending low,
Who toil along the climbing way With painful steps and slow;
Look now, for glad and golden hours Come swiftly on the wing;
Oh rest beside the weary road And hear the angels sing.

For lo! the days are hastening on, By prophets seen of old,
When with the ever-circling years Shall come the time foretold,
When the new heaven and earth shall own The Prince of Peace, their King,
And the whole world send back the song Which now the angels sing.



It Came Upon a Midnight Clear was written by Edmund Hamilton Sears in 1849. The carol started life as a poem written by its author who was a minister living in Massachusetts at the time. The music for It Came Upon A Midnight Clear was composed by American musician Richard Storrs Willis in 1859 who was inspired by the words of the poem.

25 Dec 2010 (Christmas Service - Saturday)

Barnabas P.

Shankar R.
Jocelyn C., Colleen, Peggy Tan

Lydia Sim, Meng Fhui
Darren, Terry C.
Anna Sim

Terry Chong

Hiew FF, Manjit Singh

There will be NO Sunday Service on 26th

Saturday, 18 December 2010

5th day of Christmas

Silent night, holy night All is calm, all is bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace

Silent night, holy night! Shepherds quake at the sight
Glories stream from heaven afar Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia!
Christ, the Saviour is born Christ, the Saviour is born

Silent night, holy night Son of God, love's pure light
Radiant beams from Thy holy face With the dawn of redeeming grace
Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth "



The origin of the Christmas carol we know as Silent Night was a poem that was written in 1816 by an Austrian priest called Joseph Mohr. On Christmas Eve in 1818 in the small alpine village called Oberndorf it is reputed that the organ at St. Nicholas Church had broken. Joseph Mohr gave the poem of Silent Night (Stille Nacht) to his friend Franz Xavier Gruber and the melody for Silent Night was composed with this in mind. The music to Silent Night was therefore intended for a guitar and the simple score was finished in time for Midnight Mass. Silent Night is the most famous Christmas carol of all time!

Friday, 17 December 2010

4th day of Christmas

O little town of Bethlehem How still we see thee lie
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep The silent stars go by
Yet in thy dark streets shineth The everlasting Light
The hopes and fears of all the years Are met in thee tonight

For Christ is born of Mary And gathered all above
While mortals sleep, the angels keep Their watch of wondering love
O morning stars together Proclaim the holy birth
And praises sing to God the King And Peace to men on earth

How silently, how silently The wondrous gift is given!
So God imparts to human hearts The blessings of His heaven.
No ear may his His coming, But in this world of sin,
Where meek souls will receive him still, The dear Christ enters in.

O holy Child of Bethlehem Descend to us, we pray
Cast out our sin and enter in Be born to us today
We hear the Christmas angels The great glad tidings tell
O come to us, abide with us Our Lord Emmanuel



Rector Phillips Brooks (1835-1903) of Philadelphia, wrote the words to O Little Town of Bethlehem in 1868, following a pilgrimage to the Holy Land. He was inspired by the view of Bethlehem from the hills of Palestine especially at night time hence the lyrics of O Little Town of Bethlehem. His church organist Lewis Redner (1831-1908) wrote the melody to O Little Town of Bethlehem for the Sunday school children's choir

Thursday, 16 December 2010

Why Do We Do What We Do?

And the Real Need is...

In a really difficult marriage, you will never be able to address the real problems until you understand what motivates your spouse's behavior. All of our behavior is motivated by inner needs.

One husband complained, "She thinks she is smarter than I am." His wife's perspective? "Any time I disagree with him, he thinks I'm trying to control him. I just want to be a part of the decision. Sure I call him names, but it's because I want him to listen to me." Both husband and wife are motivated by the need to be treated as a person. To feel that their ideas are important to the other.

If you can understand the motivation, you can address the need instead of arguing over the symptoms. You can start with something as simple as, "I value your ideas, and I want us to work together as a team."

3rd day of Christmas

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!



The words and lyrics of the old carol 'O Holy Night' were written by Placide Cappeau de Roquemaure in 1847. Cappeau was a wine seller by trade but was asked by the parish priest to write a poem for Christmas. He obliged and wrote the beautiful words of the hymn. He then realised that it should have music to accompany the words and he approached his friend Adolphe Charles Adams(1803-1856). He agreed and the music for the poem was therefore composed by Adolphe Charles Adams. Adolphe had attended the Paris conservatoire and forged a brilliant career as a composer. It was translated into English by John Sullivan Dwight (1812-1893).

Wednesday, 15 December 2010

2nd day of Christmas

O Come All Ye Faithful Joyful and triumphant,
O come ye, O come ye to Bethlehem.
Come and behold Him,
Born the King of Angels;

O come, let us adore Him, O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him, Christ the Lord.


O Sing, choirs of angels, Sing in exultation,
Sing all that hear in heaven God's holy word.
Give to our Father glory in the Highest;

All Hail! Lord, we greet Thee, Born this happy morning,
O Jesus! for evermore be Thy name adored.
Word of the Father, now in flesh appearing;



The text to the Carol O Come All Ye Faithful was originally written in Latin (Adeste Fideles) and was intended to be a hymn, it is attributed to John Wade, an Englishman. The music to O Come All Ye Faithful was composed by fellow Englishman John Reading in the early 1700s. The tune was first published in a collection known as "Cantus Diversi" in 1751. In 1841 Rev. Frederick Oakley is reputed to have worked on the familiar translation of O Come All Ye Faithful which replaced the older Latin lyrics "Adeste Fideles"

Tuesday, 14 December 2010

1st day of Christmas

Joy to the World , the Lord is come! Let earth receive her King;
Let every heart prepare Him room,
And Heaven and nature sing, And Heaven and nature sing,
And Heaven, and Heaven, and nature sing.

Joy to the World, the Savior reigns! Let men their songs employ;
While fields and floods, rocks, hills and plains
Repeat the sounding joy, Repeat the sounding joy,
Repeat, repeat, the sounding joy.

No more let sins and sorrows grow, Nor thorns infest the ground;
He comes to make His blessings flow
Far as the curse is found, Far as the curse is found,
Far as, far as, the curse is found.

He rules the world with truth and grace, And makes the nations prove
The glories of His righteousness,
And wonders of His love, And wonders of His love,
And wonders, wonders, of His love.



The words and lyrics of the old Christmas carol 'Joy to the World' were written in 1719 by Isaac Watts (1674-1748). Joy to the World is a popular Christmas carol which is based on Psalm 98 in the Bible. The father of John Watts was a Non-conformist and so extreme were his views that he was imprisoned twice. His father's influence over Isaac was demonstrated when he choose to attend Non­conformist Academy at Stoke Newington in preference to a University. Watts was ordained as a Pastor of an Independent congregation. He wrote many hymns and Carols and was awarded a Doctor of Divinity degree by the the University of Edinburgh in 1728. The music to the carol is by George Frederick Handel (1685-1759)

Set in Concrete: Is cementing your marriage a good thing?

People frequently contact me asking for advice concerning marriage problems. They may be having issues over things like how to raise children, money, communication, or disparity over the frequency of sex, division of domestic duties, and so on. Typical marriage problems are actually pretty simple to fix.  Some couples reach out when they are in the early stage of needing help and those cases are fairly easy to deal with.

It would be like finding a cancerous lump somewhere on your body and going to the doctor right away to be treated.  Medical professionals do wonders and can often cure the problem if you catch it in the early stages. It would be silly—although some people do it—to just sit and wait and wait and wait until your entire body is covered with tumors and then go into the doctor’s office.  He or she would wonder why on earth you didn’t do something right away.  Why didn’t you come in when it was easier to take care of? Because you waited and delayed getting medical attention, there is now advanced cancer all over your body and it’s going to be very difficult to treat.

continued here

Monday, 13 December 2010

19 Dec 2010

Dr. Siow KW

Peggy Tan
Siew Pin, Hong Lu, Foong Yee

Jocelyn Lee, Jacinta Lee
Terry C., Weng Ern
Darren

Meng Fhui

Tommy Q., Manjit Singh

Saturday, 11 December 2010

When Christ Comes

by Max Lucado

If a cluster of us summarized our emotions regarding the return of Christ in one word—what words would we hear? What word would you use?

Discomfort? Likely a popular choice. You’ve been told your mistakes will be revealed. You’ve been told your secrets will be made known. Books will be opened, and names will be read. You know God is holy. You know you are not. How could the thought of his return bring anything but discomfort?

Besides, there are all those phrases—“the mark of the beast,” “the Antichrist,” and “the battle of Armageddon.” And what about “the wars and rumors of wars”? And what was that the fellow said on TV? “Avoid all phone numbers with the digits 666.” And that magazine article disclosing the new senator as the Antichrist? Discomforting, to say the least.

Thursday, 9 December 2010

Loving by Serving

Get the Facts
Before marriage we are carried along by the emotions of the "in love" obsession. After marriage we revert to being the person we were before we "fell in love." This reality has implications for the single who is contemplating marriage.

Before you marry, you best find out what your potential spouse was like before the two of you "fell in love." Ask parents, siblings, work associates and friends, but by all means ask questions. Did they have an anger problem? Where they depressed? Were they friendly of selfish? Dependable or irresponsible? Did they have a problem with alcohol or drugs? Get the facts. Don't let the "in love" experience blind you to the truth.

Monday, 6 December 2010

12 Dec 2010

Liong KC

Kai Yew
Gigi Lim, Lydia Sim, Colleen

Meng Fhui, Jonathan Long
Anna Sim, Darren
Ken Fhui

Jocelyn Lee

Manjit Singh, Hiew FF

Saturday, 4 December 2010

How Far Do You Fall in Love?

The Other Stuff
Janice bounced into my office and said, "I'm getting married." "To whom and when?" I asked. "To David Brown in September," she said. "How long have you been dating?" "Three weeks. I know it's crazy. I can't believe it myself, but I know David is the one for me."

Later, I discovered that David had been married twice before, had three children, and had lost three jobs in the past year. None of this seemed to phase Janice. "I'm so happy, she said. " I have never been this happy before." Janice is in for a rude awakening. Two years later she was back in my office saying, "I think I've made a big mistake." What Janice illustrates is that "falling in love" is not the foundation for marriage. Better check out "the other stuff."

Friday, 3 December 2010

Rediscovering Amazement

by Max Lucado

“I am with you always…”  Matthew 28:20

From where I write I can see seven miracles.

White-crested waves slap the beach with rhythmic regularity. One after the other the rising swells of salt water gain momentum, humping, rising, then standing to salute the beach before crashing onto the sand. How many billions of times has this simple mystery repeated itself since time began?

In the distance lies a miracle of colors—twins of blue. The ocean-blue of the Atlantic encounters the pale blue of the sky, separated only by the horizon, stretched like a taut wire between two poles.

Also within my eyesight are the two bookends of life. A young mother pushes a baby in a carriage, both recent participants with God in the miracle of birth. They pass a snowy-haired, stooped old gentleman seated on a bench, a victim of life’s thief—age. (I wonder if he is aware of the curtain closing on his life.)

Thursday, 2 December 2010

Falling In and Out of Love

Recently I was asked the question: Do you believe it is possible to fall out of love with your spouse—or were you just never in love in the first place? Sorry to disillusion all of you over-romanticized thinkers out there, but my reply is not the stuff of romance novels or movie and TV land.  I know that people say they “fall in love”—sometimes even at “first sight”.  I’ve heard the scientific studies about what happens to your body and your brain when you “fall in love”. I see the way the media portrays “falling in love” as this wonderful buzz of emotions that you feel when you’ve met just the “the right one”. But truthfully, I don’t think one “falls in love”.

One can fall in the toilet or in a ditch or off a ladder. You can even fall on your face…but you do not fall in love. What are people really talking about when they use the phrase anyway? I think what they’re referring to is the failed notion of love being what you feel. That sensation that is some combination of lust, infatuation and the flurry of passionate emotions you experience in a new relationship. Quite simply, what they call “falling in love” is the buzz you feel.

Funny thing is, the Bible never talks about “falling in love”. When scripture talks about love, not once does it mention feelings.  People ask me, “Well, didn’t you fall in love with your wife?”  I love my wife, because I choose to love her.  Sure I had some euphoric type feelings way back ages ago when we first met. I’m sure I got the buzz, but if “falling in love” is merely about the buzz you feel when you are around another person, then I’ve fallen in love with many people!

continued here

Monday, 29 November 2010

5 Dec 2010

Caleb R.

Peter Long
Hong Lu, Foong Yee, Peggy Tan

Jonathan Long, Meng Fhui
Terry C., Weng Ern
Darren

Moses Tan

Hiew, Tommy Q.

Thursday, 25 November 2010

Happy Thanksgiving Day!

Happy Thanksgiving!
Thanksgiving Day provides an opportunity to build family relationships. All of us are thankful for what other family members do for us, but we don't often take time to verbalize our thanks. Find a time today and privately thank each family member for something specific that you appreciate.

Then when you have the meal, you can invite each person to express thanks to someone. Gratitude recognizes that none of us live in isolation. Life is made much easier because we help each other. Giving thanks is a way of expressing love. It could become the best Thanksgiving Day ever, if we make it a day of thanksgiving, and not just a day for eating turkey. And don't forget to thank God. Happy thanksgiving!

The Day After
Perhaps didn't open this email until the day after Thanksgiving. Yesterday, you ate turkey and gave thanks. Today you may feel sluggish and tired. After all someone did the cooking and someone washed the dishes. Why don't you take that someone out to dinner tonight. They may not want a fancy meal. Something light might be just perfect. After all, it's the thought that counts. Do you really appreciate what others do for you? How do you express your appreciation?

Perhaps you could ask: "What could I do to express my appreciation to you for all your hard work? Their suggestion may surprise you. But if you want them to feel loved and appreciated, then doing what they suggest is the best way to express it. Saying 'thank you' should not be limited to one day a year. Find a way to communicate appreciation to the people you love on a regular basis.

Share your questions, thoughts, insights, or comments:
Join the conversation on Facebook at facebook.com/5lovelanguages

No Accident

by Max Lucado

It has all the ingredients of a good sermon illustration.

It’s emotional. It’s dramatic. And it’s a story that’ll break your heart. Heaven only knows how many times preachers have used it.

There’s only one problem. It’s not accurate.

Maybe you’ve heard it.

It’s the story of an engineer who operated a drawbridge across a mighty river. With a control panel of levers and switches, he set into motion a monstrous set of gears that either lifted the bridge for the river traffic or closed it for the oncoming train.

One day he took his young son to work with him. The fascinated boy hurled question after question at his dad. It was not until the span had opened to allow the passage of a ship that the father noticed the questions had ceased and his son had left the room. He looked out the window of his control cabin and saw the young boy climbing on the teeth of the gears. As he hurried toward the machinery to get his son, he heard the whistle of an approaching train.

His pulse quickened. If he closed the bridge there would be no time to retrieve his son. He had to make a choice. Either his son would be killed or a trainload of innocent passengers would be killed. A horrible dilemma mandated a horrible decision. The engineer knew what he had to do. He reached for the lever.

A powerful story, isn’t it? It’s often used to describe the sacrifice of Christ. And it is not without its parallels. It’s true that God could not save man without killing his son. The heart of God the Father did twist in grief as he slammed the gears of death down on Jesus. And it’s sad, yet true, that the innocent have whizzed by the scene of the crime oblivious to the sacrifice that has just saved them from certain death.

But there is one inference in the story that’s woefully in need of correction.

Read this quote from the first sermon ever preached about the cross and see if you can find the revealing phrase.

Men of Israel, listen to this: Jesus of Nazareth was a man accredited by God to you by miracles, wonders and signs, which God did among you through him, as you yourselves know. This man was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross. (Acts 2:22-23)

Did you see it? It’s the solemn phrase in the paragraph. It’s the statement that rings of courage, the one with roots that extend back to eternity. It is the phrase which, perhaps as much as any in the Bible, describes the real price God paid to adopt you.

Which phrase? “God’s set purpose and foreknowledge.” The Revised Standard Version calls it “the definite plan and foreknowledge of God.” Today’s English Version translates the phrase, “In accordance with his own plan.” Regardless how you phrase it, the truth is ever so sobering: The cross was no accident.

Jesus’ death was not the result of a panicking, cosmological engineer. The cross wasn’t a tragic surprise. Calvary was not a knee-jerk response to a world plummeting towards destruction. It wasn’t a patch-job or a stop-gap measure. The death of the Son of God was anything but an unexpected peril.

No, it was part of a plan. It was a calculated choice. “It was the LORD’s will to crush him.” (Isaiah 53:10) The cross was drawn into the original blueprint. It was written into the script. The moment the forbidden fruit touched the lips of Eve, the shadow of a cross appeared on the horizon. And between that moment and the moment the man with the mallet placed the spike against the wrist of God, a master plan was fulfilled.

It was no accident—would that it had been! Even the cruelest of criminals is spared the agony of having his death sentence read to him before his life even begins.

But Jesus was born crucified. Whenever he became conscious of who he was, he also became conscious of what he had to do. The cross-shaped shadow could always be seen. And the screams of hell’s imprisoned could always be heard.

This explains the resoluteness in the words, “The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life—only to take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord.” (John 10:17-18)

The cross explains …

Why he told the Pharisees that the “goal” of his life would be fulfilled only on the third day after his death. (Luke 13:32)

It adds gravity to his prophecies, “I lay down my life for the sheep.” (John 10:15) *

This is why the ropes used to tie his hands and the soldiers used to lead him to the cross were unnecessary. They were incidental. Had they not been there, had there been no trial, no Pilate and no crowd, the very same crucifixion would have occurred. Had Jesus been forced to nail himself to the cross, he would have done it. For it was not the soldiers who killed him, nor the screams of the mob: It was his devotion to us.

So call it what you wish: An act of grace. A plan of redemption. A martyr’s sacrifice. But whatever you call it, don’t call it an accident. It was anything but that.

* Matthew 16:21


From the newly released
God Came Near: Deluxe Edition
Copyright (Thomas Nelson, 1987) Max Lucado

Monday, 22 November 2010

28 Nov 2010

Barnabas P.

Terry C.
Colleen, Jocelyn C., Shankar

Lydia Sim, Jocelyn Lee
Darren, Prisca
Ken Fhui

Moses Tan

Manjit Singh, Hiew FF

Saturday, 20 November 2010

The Question for the Canyon's Edge

by Max Lucado

The canyon of death.

Have you been there? Have you been called to stand at the thin line that separates the living from the dead? Have you lain awake at night listening to machines pumping air in and out of your lungs? Have you watched sickness corrode and atrophy the body of a friend? Have you lingered behind at the cemetery long after the others have left, gazing in disbelief at the metal casket that contains the body that contained the soul of the one you can’t believe is gone?

It is possible that I’m addressing someone who is walking the canyon wall. Someone you love dearly has been called into the unknown and you are alone. Alone with your fears and alone with your doubts. If this is the case, please read the rest of this piece very carefully. Look carefully at the scene described in John 11.

In this scene there are two people: Martha and Jesus. And for all practical purposes they are the only two people in the universe.

Her words were full of despair. “If you had been here … ” She stares into the Master’s face with confused eyes. She’d been strong long enough; now it hurt too badly. Lazarus was dead. Her brother was gone. And the one man who could have made a difference didn’t. He hadn’t even made it for the burial. Something about death makes us accuse God of betrayal. “If God were here there would be no death!” we claim.

You see, if God is God anywhere, he has to be God in the face of death. Pop psychology can deal with depression. Pep talks can deal with pessimism. Prosperity can handle hunger. But only God can deal with our ultimate dilemma—death. And only the God of the Bible has dared to stand on the canyon’s edge and offer an answer. He has to be God in the face of death. If not, he is not God anywhere.

Jesus wasn’t angry at Martha. Perhaps it was his patience that caused her to change her tone from frustration to earnestness. “Even now God will give you whatever you ask.”

Jesus then made one of those claims that place him either on the throne or in the asylum: “Your brother will rise again.”

Martha misunderstood. (Who wouldn’t have?) “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”

That wasn’t what Jesus meant. Don’t miss the context of the next words. Imagine the setting: Jesus has intruded on the enemy’s turf; he’s standing in Satan’s territory, Death Canyon. His stomach turns as he smells the sulfuric stench of the ex-angel, and he winces as he hears the oppressed wails of those trapped in the prison. Satan has been here. He has violated one of God’s creations.
With his foot planted on the serpent’s head, Jesus speaks loudly enough that his words echo off the canyon walls.

“I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die” (John 11:25).

It is a hinge point in history. A chink has been found in death’s armor. The keys to the halls of hell have been claimed. The buzzards scatter and the scorpions scurry as Life confronts death—and wins! The wind stops. A cloud blocks the sun and a bird chirps in the distance while a humiliated snake slithers between the rocks and disappears into the ground.

The stage has been set for a confrontation at Calvary.

But Jesus isn’t through with Martha. With eyes locked on hers he asks the greatest question found in Scripture, a question meant as much for you and me as for Martha.

“Do you believe this?”

Wham! There it is. The bottom line. The dimension that separates Jesus from a thousand gurus and prophets who have come down the pike. The question that drives any responsible listener to absolute obedience to or total rejection of the Christian faith.

“Do you believe this?”

Let the question sink into your heart for a minute. Do you believe that a young, penniless itinerant is larger than your death? Do you truly believe that death is nothing more than an entrance ramp to a new highway?

“Do you believe this?”

Jesus didn’t pose this query as a topic for discussion in Sunday schools. It was never intended to be dealt with while basking in the stained glass sunlight or while seated on padded pews.

No. This is a canyon question. A question which makes sense only during an all-night vigil or in the stillness of smoke-filled waiting rooms. A question that makes sense when all of our props, crutches, and costumes are taken away. For then we must face ourselves as we really are: rudderless humans tailspinning toward disaster. And we are forced to see him for what he claims to be: our only hope.

As much out of desperation as inspiration, Martha said yes. As she studied the tan face of that Galilean carpenter, something told her she’d probably never get closer to the truth than she was right now. So she gave him her hand and let him lead her away from the canyon wall.

“I am the resurrection and the life.… Do you believe this?”

From the newly released
God Came Near: Deluxe Edition
Copyright (Thomas Nelson, 1987) Max Lucado

Thursday, 18 November 2010

Emotional Capital

by Mark Gungor on November 17th, 2010

Most people understand the concept of “emotional bank accounts” where we all have a limited amount of energy or emotion to give out interacting with other people during any period of time. A person who continuously “spends” can run out of “emotional capital” and have nothing left to give. Attached to this is the idea of making “emotional deposits”. We need to fill up the account in order to be able to spend and give out again. You can make your own deposits by recuperating and doing things that emotionally energize you, or others around you can make the deposits by spending time emotionally engaging and giving to you. You may have also heard of this in terms of a “love tank” that needs to be filled in order to give to others. It is an old and very familiar notion that people are generally aware of.

Just like our checking accounts can become drained of money, our emotional accounts can be drained of emotional currency–especially when there is more going out than is coming in. You can start to run into a shortage that creates a supply and demand issue and just like with cash, it becomes a problem when you try to spend what is simply not there. We become irritated and upset especially when those emotional expenditures are not the kind we want to make.

We don’t like it when we have to “spend” our capital on things that are not essential. Put it in terms of money and it’s easy to understand. Most of us are usually not thrilled if we have to spend money on things we don’t think are necessary. Typically we like to hang onto our hard earned cash and use it for what we want. The same can be said about emotions—we don’t like it when we have to spend our “emotional capital” on people and situations that we believe are nonessential. We will all fork over the emotions for the things we think are worthy, but will resent it when someone is taking our energy if we don’t think we should have to give it….sort of like having to pay taxes, bills or extra charges when we really don’t need or want to....

continued HERE

Monday, 15 November 2010

21 Nov 2010

Chairman: Dr. Siow KW

Worship Leader: Foong Yee
Vocalist: Lareina, Peggy Tan, Hong Lu

Keyboardist: Meng Fhui, Jonathan Long
Guitarist: Terry C., Weng Ern
Drummer: Anna Sim

Projectionist: Tian Sia

PA: Manjit Singh, Tommy Q.

Monday, 8 November 2010

14 Nov 2010

Chairman: Tom C.

Worship Leader: Kai Yew
Vocalist: Jocelyn C., Siew Pin, Gigi Lim

Keyboardist: Jocelyn Lee, Jacinta Lee
Guitarist: Anna Sim, Prisca
Drummer: Darren

Projectionist: Terry C.

PA: Tommy Q., Manjit Singh

Thursday, 4 November 2010

Is it OK to be Gay and Christian?

Wednesday, 03 November 2010 10:42 AM EDT
J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones
http://www.charismamag.com/index.php/fire-in-my-bones/29512-is-it-ok-to-be-gay-and-christian#readmore

Charismatic pastor Jim Swilley’s announcement that he is gay opened the door wider for a subtle delusion. Don’t believe it.

Many people were shell-shocked last week when Atlanta pastor Jim Swilley stood in front of his congregation, Church in the Now in Conyers, Ga., and announced that he is gay. The 52-year-old minister was abruptly removed from his position in the International Communion of Charismatic Churches—a network in which he served as an overseer. Some of Swilley’s members left his church, others stayed, and countless others are now scratching their heads.

We Americans are lost in a moral fog. Two major Protestant denominations (the Episcopal Church USA and the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America) have voted to ordain gay clergy. Meanwhile, gayness is celebrated in our media, and anyone who refuses to bow to this idol is painted as intolerant and homophobic.


“The sins we avoid addressing from the pulpit are the sins that will thrive unchallenged in our culture. We must develop some backbone and speak the truth in love.”

Christians who still believe homosexuality is incompatible with biblical faith feel painted into a corner. If we defend Christian morality, and even if we speak with compassion to those who may struggle with same-sex attraction, we are accused of hate speech or branded as judgmental. So we tiptoe through the minefield of political correctness—and keep our mouths shut.

Sorry, but timidity on this issue is not acceptable. The sins we avoid addressing from the pulpit are the sins that will thrive unchallenged in our culture. We must develop some backbone and speak the truth in love. Here are four truths that should factor into any discussion on this topic:

1. Everyone is born with issues. King David wrote: “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me” (Psalm 51:5, NASB). David acknowledged that he had an inborn sin nature. This is true for all of us!

Many “gay Christian” advocates insist that some people are born homosexuals and therefore they have no hope of altering their orientation. But this is a lame argument since we all are born with a propensity toward certain sins. This is the human condition: “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Rom. 3:23). Just because you are born with an inclination toward adultery, alcoholism, shoplifting or pride doesn’t mean you have to stay that way.

2. Christ offers forgiveness and sexual healing. The more strident voices in the gay community hate when Christians speak about homosexuals being healed or reformed. They insist that if you are gay, you must stay that way. They choose to ignore the fact that thousands of people have left homosexuality after coming to faith in Christ.

My friend Alan Chambers, president of Exodus International, came out of the gay lifestyle many years ago and now has a great marriage with his wife, Leslie, plus two beautiful children. The ministry he leads has helped countless people—including many Christian “strugglers”—find emotional freedom. Some of them experienced same-sex feelings from childhood; others developed these feelings because they were sexually molested or because of dysfunction in their families.

Whatever the cause of sexual brokenness, the gospel has always provided the solution. It was true for people in the Corinthian church, to whom Paul wrote: “Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals … will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God” (1 Cor. 6:9-11, emphasis added).

3. Discipleship requires self-denial. In his announcement to his church last week, Jim Swilley said he decided to come out as gay because he was tired of pretending. I’ve talked with others who told me they felt they were being “dishonest” by ignoring their gay feelings. They said they felt free when they accepted “who they really are” and got involved in gay relationships.

For a Christian, that’s a cop out. The essence of our walk with Christ involves denial. Jesus said: “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me” (Matt. 16:24). Jesus was not asking us to pretend we don’t have problems—He calls us to bring all of those problems into His light through repentance. But the Holy Spirit gives us the power to deny sinful desires. That quality of self-control is a fruit of the Spirit (see Gal. 6:22-23).

4. Homosexuality is not a protected category of sin. Many “gay Christian” advocates insist that if you are gay, then it’s fine to go out and have all the sex you want. They ignore biblical commandments against homosexuality (usually by saying that Old Testament law doesn’t apply today); meanwhile they advocate gay marriage even though most gay men are rarely monogamous. The message is clear: If you have same-sex desires, just go ahead and indulge because that’s how you were created.

This is what the Bible calls licentiousness—which means “lacking legal or moral restraints, especially sexual restraints; disregarding rules.” Actually, the Bible lumps homosexuality in with every other form of sexual sin—and says God will punish those who engage in it. After Paul warns about every form of immorality, he says: “So, he who rejects [these rules] is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you” (1 Thess. 4:8).

Regardless of how loudly the world trumpets its hedonistic agenda—and no matter how many backslidden preachers dance to the tune—God has the final say on this matter.

J. Lee Grady is contributing editor of Charisma. You can follow him on Twitter at leegrady His most recent book is The Holy Spirit Is Not for Sale (Chosen). For more information about Exodus International, go to exodusinternational.org.


Read more: http://www.charismamag.com/index.php/fire-in-my-bones/29512-is-it-ok-to-be-gay-and-christian#readmore#ixzz14HCVvG9Y

Wednesday, 3 November 2010

Christians Think Too Much

by Mark Gungor on May 25th, 2010
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I’m convinced that many Christians think too much. Let me explain. It’s not a matter of learning, using common sense or exercising your intellectual abilities. What I mean is that people put far too much weight on what they think instead of being concerned about what the bible says.

Here is a news flash for you: God loves you but doesn’t give a rat’s butt what you think. He is not sitting up in heaven taking a poll on the public opinion here on Earth trying to decide if he should alter his rules based on what you or anyone else thinks. Seriously, I don’t think that God calls all the angels together and says, “You know, I believe we should make some changes around here. After all, Susan, Bobby and all these other people think that it’s ok to live together before marriage. Jane and John and their friends all think it’s ok to commit adultery because they really love this other person. Maybe we need to change our policies.”

God is actually God and he has thoughts, ways and standards that are His and His alone. He tells us in scripture what to do and how to behave, and your opinion on it is irrelevant. I don’t even care what I think because it simply doesn’t matter. The bible says “thou shall not kill” or “thou shall not commit adultery” and I never even consider asking myself the question, “But what do I think of that?” All that matters is what God says and what God thinks. I base my choices and behavior on pleasing Him.

On judgment day your opinion won’t matter because God is not going to go by what you thought of his instructions and commands. After all, it’s not like what God says is merely a bunch of suggestions to follow only if you like them, if they are convenient and work for you. For instance, the bible says Christians should meet together regularly. Yet you might say, “Yeah, I know I am supposed to go to church, but I don’t really think you have to. I think a person can follow God without actually going to a building. I think I can find God by spending time in nature or just praying and listening to CDs of sermons.” Who cares what you think? And by the way, you are wrong. God’s word is God’s word and what He says trumps what you think.

How about as Christians we start reading the bible and actually do what it says. It doesn’t matter that you think it’s not necessary to attend church or give money. You are wrong, because God says you should. He doesn’t care that you think it’s okay to commit adultery or divorce your spouse because you just aren’t happy. You are wrong. We are believers and our life and actions should be based on what the bible says—what God says. It should be our aim to please Him and make Him happy.

Here’s an analogy to help in understanding this: Let’s say you really want to please me. Maybe you’re trying to impress me in order to get a job, or get me to do something for you and you want to make me happy. Wouldn’t you try to figure out what I think, what I want and like and then act accordingly? I may ask you to bring me something to drink and the people who know me tell you, “Hey, Mark really likes hot chocolate—not cappuccino.” Now if you want to make me happy, then you’ll bring me hot chocolate. What would happen if you decided to bring me cappuccino anyway? I might tell you that I don’t like cappuccino, and if you reply, “Yeah, well, I know that, but I really like it. I think it’s good. Lots of people like it. There’s nothing wrong with it. This is perfectly good cappuccino so I brought it for you anyway.” I would look at you like you were crazy. You acted according to what you thought, but you didn’t please me. It wouldn’t work for me and it won’t work with God either. You must do what pleases Him.

People intentionally disobey the word of God just to make themselves happy and are insulting Him in every conceivable way. They want his blessings and do not make any connection between the way they are living their lives and the obedience God requires of us. I’ve had couples who are living together and having sex, sit in my office and ask me, “Pastor Mark, we have all these struggles and issues. Why isn’t God blessing our lives?” I explain to them that they are sinning and doing all the wrong things but they just do not get the connection. They rationalize and justify their sinful behaviors and wonder why things aren’t going well for them! Many people expect God to be there for them and meet their needs and bless them regardless of the fact that they are blatantly insulting His word and standards by doing all the wrong stuff.

I will hear people, who apparently know the bible, say crazy things like, “Well, I know the bible says such and such, but I don’t think that really matters. That isn’t really what it means. I don’t think God will hold us to that.” Talk about arrogance. Millions of people do this all the time and they actually believe that what they think is all that matters. There are others who truly don’t know what the bible says. If you are one of those people, you really need to read it to find out and then do what His word tells us to do. But don’t run it through your philosophy or filters. Don’t let the pop-psychologists, self-help books, Oprah, your friends, family or even some pastor tell you that what you think is all that really matters.

The bible tells us in Romans 12:3 “…Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment…” Be less concerned about what you think and more concerned about what God says. Learn what pleases Him and live according to His ways. As Christians we need to stop “thinking” about the bible and start obeying it.

Stay Away from the Edge

by Mark Gungor on November 2nd, 2010
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In a previous post I talked about the Damage of Sexual Promiscuity—more specifically, the “imprinting” that happens during a person’s initial sexual experiences.

People have read the article or have heard me talk about his and contact me after they realize they have been improperly “imprinted” on—especially through lust-filled, elicit sex and the use of pornography and masturbation—and they want to know if and how it can be reversed or erased. They wonder if it’s possible to go back to a clean slate–kind of like the old Etch-a-Sketch toy where you could turn the knobs and a little line would appear on the screen so you could draw pictures. Then when you wanted to start over, you just tipped the thing upside down and shook it to make all the lines disappear—all was erased and you would have the blank screen again. They ask if it’s possible to get back to the blank screen when it comes to sex.

This was the case with a young man I recently heard from through my radio show. He was one of those people, like so many, that had been affected by his early exploits with lust-filled sex. Since then he had gone on to be a born-again believer, who loves God and is doing all he can to live for Jesus. He wrote to me explaining that he and his wonderful wife of ten years were having some issues. He was still struggling with the desires and “pictures” in his head after all this time and wanted to recreate those things of the past to make their sex life more interesting. That is the power of sexual imprinting.

His wife did not have those types of early experiences, was much more conservative in her approach to sex, and uncomfortable with what her husband wanted. He didn’t force her into anything, but felt the pull to go back and relive those things that were so very exciting in his past. There was frustration and tension between them because of this and he wanted to know how to fix it. This young man—as many people wonder—wanted to know “how far” he could go and still have it be “ok”. Where was the line on what constituted lust? My advice to people who are struggling with this is to stay as far away from the line as you can. Be very deliberate to avoid anything of the lust-filled nature and aim to be as conservative as possible. You won’t get free if you just “cut back” or keep “toeing the line”; you need to stop it all together to break this.

It reminds me about a story of a wealthy man back in the horse and buggy days who was looking to hire a carriage driver. There were three candidates and he asked all three of them the same question: How close to the edge of the cliff can you drive and not go over the edge? The first guy said he could get within two inches and not lose the carriage. The second guy said he could get within a half inch. But the third man wisely said, “I stay as far away from the edge as possible.” He’s the one who got the job and was thinking the right way. Why take the risk? Why push the boundaries? Why do something if it makes the passenger nervous and uncomfortable just so you can have the thrill?!

It’s not about how much you can “get away with”. You need to steer clear, learn to key off your spouse and do what she likes. You must not make it about all the things that are a part of pornography and the promiscuity of your past, rather make it about pleasing her. Men should be lovers to women in the first place. It’s not about what she does to you. Pornography has turned men into selfish pigs who have lost the art of making love to a woman. People who struggle with this can be changed through prayer and with God’s help, but they must be very deliberate. The bible tells us we will be transformed by the renewing of our minds. We need to change the way we think so that sex isn’t about being selfish and your spouse isn’t there just for you to be satisfied.

If you are “bored” or find that sex is a “drag”, try doing a sex fast for a week or two—maybe even a month if need be. This goes for both men and women—it’s not as common or talked about as frequently, but women can and do have the same issues with lust. Allow your desire to build during that time and concentrate on only your husband or wife. No porn, no masturbating—think only of him or her, focus on that one man or that one woman. Give them your time and attention; flirt with each other to let the sexual tension build until you can retrain yourself to respond only to your spouse without needing all the other garbage to arouse and satisfy you. It will change your life and set you free.

Know that “kind of” staying away from the lust or “cutting back” won’t do it. You need to stop it. For men and women who are Christians, nothing is more miserable than being stuck in a lustful world you know you shouldn’t be in. Dangling dangerously close to the precipice doesn’t work…be like the wise carriage driver and stay as far away from the edge of the cliff as possible.

Monday, 1 November 2010

Worship Roster 24-Oct 2010 to 9-Jan 2011

Worship Roster (PDF file)

7 Nov 2010 (to be confirmed)

WFA 25th Anniversary Celebration Service @ Min Kok

Chairman: Caleb R.

Worship Leader: Peggy Tan
Vocalists: Colleen, Foong Yee, Hong Lu

Keyboardist: Prisca, Meng Fhui
Guitarist: Terry C., Weng Ern
Drummer: Ken Fhui

Projectionist: Moses Tan

PA: Hiew FF, Tommy .Q

Wednesday, 27 October 2010

Why ARE so many modern British career women converting to Islam?

Tony Blair’s sister-in-law announced her conversion to Islam last weekend. Journalist Lauren Booth embraced the faith after what she describes as a ‘holy experience’ in Iran.

She is just one of a growing number of modern British career women to do so. Here, writer EVE AHMED, who was raised as a Muslim before rejecting the faith, explores the reasons why.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1324039/Like-Lauren-Booth-ARE-modern-British-career-women-converting-Islam.html

Monday, 25 October 2010

31 Oct 2010

Chairman: Barnabas P.

Worship Leader: Prisca
Vocalist: Siew Pin, Jocelyn C, Lareina

Keyboardist: Lydia Sim, Jocelyn Lee
Guitarist: Darren , Ken Fhui
Drummer: Jaemy C.

Projectionist: Meng Fhui

PA: Manjit Singh, Tommy Q.

Saturday, 23 October 2010

Vatican Mideast synod ends with criticism of Israel

published in theStar
By Philip Pullella

VATICAN CITY (Reuters) - Israel cannot use the Biblical concept of a promised land or a chosen people to justify new settlements in Jerusalem or territorial claims, a Vatican synod on the Middle East said on Saturday.
Pope Benedict XVI celebrates a mass marking the opening of the Synod of bishops from the Middle Eastern region at the Vatican October 10, 2010.Israel cannot use the Biblical concept of a promised land or a chosen people to justify new settlements in Jerusalem or territorial claims, a Vatican synod on the Middle East said. (REUTERS/Tony Gentile/Files)

In its concluding message after two weeks of meetings, the synod of bishops from the Middle East also said it hoped a two-state solution for peace between Israel and the Palestinians could be lifted from dream to reality and called for peaceful conditions that would stop a Christian exodus from the region.

"We have meditated on the situation of the holy city of Jerusalem. We are anxious about the unilateral initiatives that threaten its composition and risk to change its demographic balance," the message said.

U.S.-brokered peace talks have stalled since Israel rejected appeals to extend a temporary moratorium on settlement construction in the occupied West Bank that expired last month.

Since the freeze expired, Israel has announced plans to build another 238 homes in two East Jerusalem neighbourhoods, drawing the condemnation of Palestinians and world leaders.

In a separate part of the document -- a section on cooperation with Jews -- the synod fathers also took issue with Jews who use the Bible to justify settlements in the West Bank, which Israel captured in 1967.

"Recourse to theological and biblical positions which use the Word of God to wrongly justify injustices is not acceptable," the document said.

Many Jewish settlers and right-wing Israelis claim a biblical birthright to the occupied West Bank, which they call Judea and Samaria and regard as a part of historical, ancient Israel given to the Jews by God.

"THERE IS NO LONGER A CHOSEN PEOPLE"

Asked about the passage at a news conference, Greek-Melchite Archbishop Cyrille Salim Bustros, said:

"We Christians cannot speak about the promised land for the Jewish people. There is no longer a chosen people. All men and women of all countries have become the chosen people.

"The concept of the promised land cannot be used as a base for the justification of the return of Jews to Israel and the displacement of Palestinians," he added. "The justification of Israel's occupation of the land of Palestine cannot be based on sacred scriptures."

The synod's concluding message repeated a Vatican call for Jerusalem to have a special status "which respects its particular character" as a city sacred to the three great monotheistic religions -- Judaism, Christianity and Islam.

Jerusalem remains a key issue of dispute. Palestinians want East Jerusalem for capital of a future state. Israel has annexed the area, a move never recognised internationally, and has declared Jerusalem to be its "united and eternal" capital.

Israel did not include East Jerusalem as part of its 10-month building freeze, though most plans there were put on hold in March, when the U.S. protested reports of a new housing project leaked during a visit by Vice President Joe Biden.

East Jerusalem was also captured by Israel in 1967.

While recognising "the suffering and insecurity in which Israelis live" and the need for Israel to enjoy peace within internationally recognised borders, the document was much more expansive and detailed on the situation of Palestinians.

It said Palestinians "are suffering the consequences of the Israeli occupation: the lack of freedom of movement, the wall of separation and the military checkpoints, the political prisoners, the demolition of homes, the disturbance of socio-economic life and the thousands of refugees".

It urged Christians in the region not to sell their homes and properties. "It is a vital aspect of the lives of those who remain there and for those who one day will return there."

It condemned terrorism "from wherever it may proceed" as well as anti-Semitism, Islamophobia and discrimination against Christians.

(Additional reporting by Allyn Fisher-Ilan in Jerusalem; Editing by Mark Heinrich)

Copyright © 2010 Reuters

Monday, 18 October 2010

24 Oct 2010

Dr. Siow KW

Shankar
Hong Lu, Foong Yee, Colleen

Meng Fhui, Jacinta Lee
Anna Sim
Weng Ern, Khen Fhui

Moses Tan

Manjit Singh, Hiew FF.

Friday, 15 October 2010

There Ain’t No Easy Button

by Mark Gungor on September 17th, 2010
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Lots of people wish life had an easy button… like the commercial for the office supply store Staples, where you just push the big red button with the word “easy” on it and everything you want just magically happens. But the reality is, there are no easy buttons in life, and that is especially true in Christianity—even though people often think and act like God is the easy button for us.

Frequently, believers will treat God like the magic genie or giant vending machine in the sky. We ask Him to do things just so we don’t have to do it ourselves; then we don’t have to put any work or effort into a situation. Husbands and wives will pray for God to make their marriage better, yet they will continue to invest no time and attention into the relationship. People may be diagnosed with some illness or condition and beg God to heal them and take it away, but they won’t do anything to change their diet, exercise or lifestyle that would improve their health. Students will blow off studying for an exam, yet earnestly pray for God to help them do well on the test. There are people who pray and ask God to bring them a job or a spouse, but never go out and look for one! I hate to be the one to break the news to you, but that’s not the way it works.

God will help us. We can ask Him to give us the strength and courage to persevere and do the right things—like dealing with disease, a difficult relationship, or temptation—but He doesn’t just magically fix it or take it all away to make it easy. This is especially true when it comes to dealing with and controlling feelings. Here is one common example that I’ve heard numerous times from men: I’m so tempted to look at other women and pornography and I’ve prayed and prayed for God to take those feelings away. I’ve also heard people say that they are experiencing great temptation with attraction to another person other than their spouse and want God to just “take those feelings away”. Mind you, they don’t want to flee the temptation or stay away from this person or situation. They don’t want to learn to control their feelings—they want the easy button instead. And quite simply, there isn’t one.

Part of being a Christ follower is learning not to be led by feelings. We must learn that feelings don’t determine our behavior or else we will be doomed. Most people think that if they feel it, they just have to do it and that’s why they pray those prayers asking God to “take them away”. They reason that surely humans can’t help what they feel! Sadly, too many people end up being slaves to their feelings and think they cannot possibly manage, control or resist their urges, temptations and emotions. Therefore they believe that the only reasonable and certain solution is for God to just zap them away. Nonsense!

The bible is very clear that we are to fight temptation and that God will help us so we don’t have to succumb. I Corinthians 10:13 says: No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (NIV) That means you don’t have to give in, nothing is too much for you to take—despite what your feelings tell you. In the book of James scripture tells us to resist the devil and he will flee from you (4:7). But we don’t want to resist the devil; we want to pray and ask God to make him to go away. These are wrong thoughts and wrong prayers. God won’t do it. He won’t sprinkle you with pixie dust and make it all vanish. We are expected to live by His word and that means we have to do our part in this—never giving up and never giving in. James goes on to say we are blessed when we persevere (1:12 and 5:11)

Every human being is tempted—whether that means you are tempted by visual lusts, feelings of attraction or dissatisfaction, the tendency to be mean and nasty to people, complacency in your faith, food, alcohol, drugs, and the list goes on and on—but that doesn’t mean we are to be condemned for feeling certain things. We are to resist, not in our own will power, because as believers we have the Holy Spirit and the power of the risen Christ at work in us to enable us to stand up to any and every temptation or feeling. The problem is often people equate the want to with the have to, but just because you feel it, doesn’t mean that you listen to those wants or feelings or that you act upon them. And sometimes those “want tos” can be really strong, but they are never greater than the strength we have as Christians. Don’t tell me that your desire to look at porn is more powerful than Jesus!

It’s at times of temptation and struggle that we must rely on the power available to us. That is when it is vitally important to have the word of God in you so are able to quote the truths of scripture that will enable you to combat and fight those urges.** Only then will we be able to break free from being a slave to feelings and not allow emotions to dictate our choices. We must stop thinking we have to be “true and honest to our feelings”. They are the most unreliable and dishonest thing a person could possibly follow. As Christians we must learn to control our feelings and not allow them to control us.

Stop asking and expecting God to do all the heavy lifting, just so you can have it easy and not do the work that it requires. Remember, there is no easy button in heaven…you’ll have to go to Staples for that.

**For a list of scripture to help you with any kind of temptation, please see our link at http://www.laughyourway.com/resources/sexual-addiction/.

Wednesday, 13 October 2010

The Case for Early Marriage: 7/7

 Enduring Gospel Witness
Abstinence is not to blame for our marital crisis. But promoting it has come at a cost in a permissive world in which we are increasingly postponing marriage. While I am no fan of the demographic realities I outlined earlier, one thing I will remember is that while sex matters, marriage matters more. The importance of Christian marriage as a symbol of God's covenantal faithfulness to his people—and a witness to the future union of Christ and his bride—will only grow in significance as the wider Western culture diminishes both the meaning and actual practice of marriage. Marriage itself will become a witness to the gospel.

Romantic relationship formation is what I study. I've spoken with hundreds of young adults about not only what they think or hope for, but also what they actually do. Time and again, I've listened to Christian undergraduates recount to me how their relationships turned sexual. One thing I never ask them is why. I know why. Because sex feels great, it feels connectional, it feels deeply human. I never blame them for wanting that. Sex is intended to deepen personal relationships, and desire for it is intended to promote marriage. Such are the impulses of many young Christians in love. In an environment where parents and peers are encouraging them to delay thoughts of marriage, I'm not surprised that their sexuality remains difficult to suppress and the source of considerable angst. We would do well to recognize some of these relationships for what they are: marriages in the making. If a young couple displays maturity, faith, fidelity, a commitment to understanding marriage as a covenant, and a sense of realism about marriage, then it's our duty—indeed, our pleasure—to help them expedite the part of marriage that involves public recognition and celebration of what God is already knitting together. We ought to "rejoice and delight" in them, and praise their love (Song of Sol. 1:4).

Mark Regnerus, Ph.D., is the author of Forbidden Fruit: Sex and Religion in the Lives of American Teenagers (Oxford, 2007). He's an associate professor of sociology at the University of Texas, Austin, where he lives with his wife, Deeann, and their three children.

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Monday, 11 October 2010

17-Oct-10

Liong KC

Foong Yee
Jocelyn Choong, Hong Lu, Peggy Tan

Prisca, Jonathan L
Anna Sim, Weng Ern
Ken Fhui

Meng Fhui
Manjit Singh, Hiew FF

Sunday Sermon 10-Oct-2010

Pas. Paul Passi
SIB Seremban

http://www.mediafire.com/?a49q5z7xie0bd7x

Sunday, 10 October 2010

The Case for Early Marriage: 6/7

Toward this end, pastors, premarital counselors, and Christian friends must be free to speak frankly into the lives of those seeking their counsel about marriage. While it may be nice to find an optimal match in marriage, it cannot hold a candle to sharing a mental and spiritual commitment to the enduring covenant between God, man, and woman. It just can't. People change. Chemistry wanes. Covenants don't.

(4) Marrying for Sex: One byproduct of the abstinence culture is that some marry early simply for the promise of long-awaited, guilt-free sex. After all, Paul told us that it's better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Cor. 7). And modern America certainly bears a striking resemblance to Corinth, whose church was confused about what to do with marriage. Its people were delaying marriage, just like we are. Yet in our culture of shallow marriages and easy divorce, marrying simply for the lure of sex is not what Paul had in mind. He reminded the Corinthians—and us—of the only two callings for believers in this matter: a season or lifetime of singleness, or marriage. In other words, our freedom to serve as singles or our submission as married people is never intended to be about us. It's about God. While I certainly understand the biological urge to mate, we need to remind young adults that values like generosity, courage, dependability, compassion, and godliness live on far longer than do high testosterone and estrogen levels. Simply put, family and friends ought to do their best to help young couples discern whether there is more to their love than sexual desire.

(5) Unrealistic expectations: Today's young adults show tremendous optimism about their own personal futures, leading many to sense they are entitled to a great marriage that will commence according to plan, on their timetable. Unfortunately, marital life often ends up looking different from what they had anticipated. Marriage is a remarkable institution in many ways, but it cannot bear all of the unrealistic expectations that we moderns have heaped upon it.

So enough of the honeymoon banter: insiders know that a good marriage is hard work, and that its challenges often begin immediately. The abstinence industry perpetuates a blissful myth; too much is made of the explosively rewarding marital sex life awaiting abstainers. The fact is that God makes no promises of great sex to those who wait. Some experience difficult marriages. Spouses wander. Others cannot conceive children.

In reality, spouses learn marriage, just like they learn communication, child-rearing, or making love. Unfortunately, education about marriage is now sadly perceived as self-obvious, juvenile, or feminine, the domain of disparaged home economics courses. Nothing could be further from the truth.

In sum, Christians need to get real about marriage: it's a covenant helpmate thing that suffers from too much idealism and too little realism.Weddings may be beautiful, but marriages become beautiful. Personal storytelling and testimonies can work wonders here, since so much about life is learned behavior. Young adults want to know that it's possible for two fellow believers to stay happy together for a lifetime, and they need to hear how the generations preceding them did it.

Friday, 8 October 2010

Forgiveness Part 2: What is Forgiveness?

by Mark Gungor on October 4th, 2010
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In the previous post I wrote about why it is imperative to let go of hurts and offenses and to live your life walking in forgiveness. As Christians we do not have the luxury of remaining bitter, vengeful, unforgiving and holding grudges. I laid out the scriptural commands that instruct us on forgiveness and showed the gravity of the situation when we do not forgive others. Knowing that God will not forgive us if we don’t forgive others is a pretty sobering thought and should be all the motivation we need. Yet we often have difficulty with forgiving those who have transgressed against us and hurt us. I think we don’t really understand what it means to forgive someone.

Many times people have trouble forgiving because they believe that it’s tied to emotions or memory and they think they have to stop feeling or stop remembering in order to forgive. Not true. I teach every weekend at my marriage seminar and write about it in my book Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage. Here is an excerpt:

The first thing you have to understand about forgiveness is that is has nothing to do with your emotions. You may feel the emotional pain of what that other person did to you till the day you die—it has nothing to do with forgiveness.

Second, forgiveness has nothing to do with erasing your memory. You may remember what that person did to you till the day you die. Forgiveness is simply this: a decision to let it go. The Greek word that translates to “forgiveness” is aphieeme,” literally “to send off,” “to release,” or “to let go.” This means forgiveness is the act of sending away incidents that cause offense to brew in us. It means we can’t keep focusing on the wrong done to us. Forgiveness is an act. This is an example of forgiveness: ‘I forgive you. I will never use it against you in the future. I will never speak of it again to you or to anyone else.”

When you forgive, you decide to release the person from his or her guilt, period. You may remember the offense repeatedly at first. That’s okay. The commitment to forgive a person is a commitment to “send away” the incident every time it reappears in your mind.

Once the apostle Peter asked Jesus, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” That’s 490 times.

Luke, in his Gospel, adds the phrase “a day.’ Imagine forgiving the same person 490 times a day! Truth is, it is pretty easy to get consumed by someone’s offense. When a person does something that really hurts you, you will naturally think about it over and over again. Practicing the principle of forgiving someone 490 times a day means every time you think about what that person did to you, you prayerfully give it to God. The choice to forgive means we keep forgiving. Over time you will find the incident losing strength.

You must also remember that forgiveness has more to do with your tongue than your head or your heart. If you’re still talking about what that person did to you, you haven’t forgiven him or her. You need to hush. You need to let it go. The good news is, God will help you do this.

See, you don’t have to erase your feelings or memories. Forgiveness is not amnesia; it’s intentionally choosing to let the offense go. When God forgives us He never brings it up again. The Bible says he throws it in the sea of forgetfulness. But it’s not like he’s an old man who has Alzheimer’s. Do you really think that God can’t remember? It’s not as if God looks at you and goes, “There’s something that ticks me off about this guy, but I just can’t remember what it is!” You think God literally can’t remember? Of course He can, He just chooses not to. He never brings it up again. He never, ever, ever, will speak of it or use it against you in any way, shape, or form. And that’s what you need to do as a Christian. You need to quite talking about it…and that includes the running conversations you have with yourself in your head!

When an offense is new and you are first dealing with all the emotion and hurt, you need to talk through it and all. I get that and I’m not condemning that. But at some point you have to stop, let it go and you have to let go of the anger and hate in your heart. People complain that it’s hard to do. Yeah, that’s why you need to pray and ask God to help you. I’ve struggled with this. There have been times in my life that I’ve been so angry and I didn’t want to forgive. But I knew better. I knew this was not okay and I took it so seriously because I know what the Bible says. So in tears and crying out to God, I dealt with it and broke through. So I’m not condemning people who struggle with this—we all struggle. If you are a Christian you have to let it go. If you say you have forgiven the person, but are constantly in a state of pain day after day, into week after month after year, you have only re-titled the unforgiveness as “pain”. Be aware of the struggle and realize that it’s not a good place for you to be. It might take some work, but you need to get out of it.

Refusing to forgive another doesn’t make right the wrong, nor does it even the score or supply vengeance. It only hurts the one who refuses to forgive. Unforgiveness is like taking poison in hopes that the other guy will die. And it is literally like a toxic poison in your body. It will make you sick and destroy you, your life and your relationships. Jesus taught that without forgiveness, your very relationship to God is doomed. And I can assure you that without forgiveness, your marriage is doomed.

*Also see the related post “I Said I Was Sorry”.

Thursday, 7 October 2010

The Case for Early Marriage: 5/7

 (2) Immaturity: Even if economic security is not a concern, immaturity and naïveté often characterize young marriages. While unlearning self-centeredness and acquiring a sacrificial side aren't easy at any age, naïveté may actually benefit youth, since preferences and habits ingrained over years of single life often are not set aside easily. Let's face it: Young adults are inexperienced, but they are not intrinsically incompetent at marriage. So they need, of course, the frank guidance of parents, mentors, and Christian couples.

Women, however, do tend to exhibit greater maturity earlier than men. As a result, it shouldn't surprise us when a young woman falls in love with someone three, five, even ten years her senior. Indeed, two of the finest marriages I've recently witnessed exhibit nearly a dozen years' difference between husband and wife. While there are unwise ages to marry, there is no right age for which we must make our children wait. Indeed, age integration is one of the unique hallmarks of the institutional church, tacitly contesting the strict age-separation patterns that have long characterized American schools and universities.

One common way that immaturity reveals itself is when parents or children make marriage into another form of social competition or sibling rivalry. Modern adolescence and young adulthood read like one contest after another: the race to win in sports, to get good grades, to attend a prestigious college, to attract the best-looking person, to secure that coveted job. Where does it end? Not with marriage. Even college students who wish to marry are painfully (or proudly) aware of the "ring by spring" competition. Marriage becomes equated with beautiful, successful people. Weddings become expensive displays of personal and family status. Clergy often get caught in the middle of this, and feel powerless to contest it. My father, a minister, told me that he'd rather "bury people than marry people."

Such is the pressure cooker of modern weddings. None of this is good. Marriage is too important and too serious to be treated as yet another game to play, with winners and losers. It's a covenant of mutual submission and sacrificial love, not a contest of prestige, social norms, and saving face. A trend toward more modest weddings would be a great start.

(3) A Poor Match: Marrying early can mean a short search process, which elevates the odds of a poorer match. In the age of online dating personality algorithms and matches (see "Restless, Reformed, and Single," page 28), Americans have become well acquainted with the cultural notion that getting the right fit in a marital partner is extremely important. Chemistry is the new watchword as we meld marriage with science. Should opposites attract? Or should we look for common interests?

There is no right answer to such questions, because successful marriages are less about the right personalities than about the right practices, like persistent communication and conflict resolution, along with the ability to handle the cyclical nature of so much about marriage, and a bedrock commitment to its sacred unity. Indeed, marriage research confirms that couples who view their marriages as sacred covenants are far better off than those who don't.

Monday, 4 October 2010

10-Oct-10

Caleb R.

Terry C
Shankar R., Gigi Lim, Lareina

Meng Fhui, Lydia Sim
Ken Fhui, Terry C.
Darren

Moses Tan
Hiew, Tommy Q.

The Case for Early Marriage: 4/7

As a result, many young adults sense that putting oneself in the trust of another person so soon may be foolish and risky. Many choose to wait out the risk—sometimes for years—to see how a relationship will fare before committing. (We seem to have lost our ability to shame men for such incessant delays.) Consequently, the focus of 20-somethings has become less about building mature relationships and fulfilling responsibilities, and more about enjoying oneself, traveling, and trying on identities and relationships. After all the fun, it will be time to settle down and get serious.

Most young Americans no longer think of marriage as a formative institution, but rather as the institution they enter once they think they are fully formed. Increasing numbers of young evangelicals think likewise, and, by integrating these ideas with the timeless imperative to abstain from sex before marriage, we've created a new optimal life formula for our children: Marriage is glorious, and a big deal. But it must wait. And with it, sex. Which is seldom as patient.

Objections to Young Marriage
Now let's have a dose of that pragmatic reasoning, because there are some good reasons to avoid marrying young. Indeed, studies continue to show that early marriage is the number one predictor of divorce. So why on earth would I want to consider such a disastrous idea that flies in the face of the evidence? Two reasons:

First, what is deemed "early marriage" by researchers is commonly misunderstood. The most competent evaluations of early marriage and divorce note that the association between early age-at-marriage and divorce occurs largely among those who marry as teenagers (before age 20). Although probably all of us know successful examples of such marriages, I still don't think teen marriage is wise. But the data suggest that marriages that commence in the early 20s are not as risky—especially for women—as conventional wisdom claims.

Second, the age at which a person marries never causes divorce. Rather, a young age-at-marriage is an indicator of an underlying proclivity for marital problems, the kind most Christian couples learn to avoid or solve without parting. Family scholars agree that there are several roots to the link between age-at-marriage and divorce. I consider five of them here, together with some practical ways that parents, friends, and the church can work to turn such weaknesses into strengths.

(1) Economic insecurity: Marrying young can spell poverty, at least temporarily. Yet the mentality that we need to shield young adults from the usual struggles of life by encouraging them to delay marriage until they are financially secure usually rests on an unrealistic standard of living. Good marriages grow through struggles, including economic ones. My wife and I are still fiscal conservatives because of our early days of austerity.

Nevertheless, the economic domain remains an area in which many parents are often able, but frequently unwilling, to assist their children. Many well-meaning parents use their resources as a threat, implying that if their children marry before the age at which their parents socially approve, they are on their own. No more car insurance. No help with tuition. No more rent.

This doesn't sound very compassionate toward marriage—or toward family members. This is, however, a two-way street: many young adults consider it immature or humiliating to rely on others for financial or even social support. They would rather deal with sexual guilt—if they sense any at all—than consider marrying before they think they are ready. This cultural predilection toward punishing rather than blessing marriage must go, and congregations and churchgoers can help by dropping their own punitive positions toward family members, as well as by identifying deserving young couples who could use a little extra help once in a while. Christians are great about supporting their missionaries, but in this matter, we can be missionaries to the marriages in our midst.