Choosing for Life

In most of youth groups and university student groups where I am asked to speak, the most frequently requested topic is dating and choosing a spouse. Young men and women want to know how to relate, date, and find a mate. They also want some clear answers, not just general principles.

The questions young people ask follow a similar line in all of the youth groups and campus fellowships. What they are looking for is clarity, a commodity not always readily available. Complexity may be fine for chemistry, algebra, political science, but when it comes to Christian principles of dating and courtship clear, practical, applicable wisdom is what we need more than anything.

I'm a New Christian...

Max on Life #62
The following is a one of 172 questions and answers from the new book,Max on Life.


I’m a new Christian who is trying to figure out how to grow closer to God. Friends tell me I need to have a quiet time with God each day, but I can’t figure out exactly what to do.

Denalyn and I like to go to the same restaurants over and over again. You could call our dates predictable, but for us they are special. We like the food. We like the servers. We like the atmosphere. When we’re there, we remember special moments we’ve shared before. Our hearts open up . . . we lose track of time . . . because we’re comfortable in that place. We talk to each other, listen to each other, laugh, and cry. I love those times!

A quiet time with God is very similar to a date. Here are some tools to help you keep your very special date with God.

Decide on a regular time and place. Select a slot in your schedule and a corner of your world, and claim it for God. A familiar place will remind you of similar feelings you experienced before with God. You need to get comfortable.

How much time should you take? As much as you need. Value quality over quantity. Your time with God should last long enough for you to say what you want and for God to say what he wants.

You should bring on your date an open Bible—God’s Word, his love letter to you. You won’t necessarily hear God speak out loud, but you can hear what he has to say through his eternal dialogue with humanity.

You also need a listening heart. Don’t forget the admonition from James: “The man who looks into the perfect mirror of God’s law, the law of liberty, and makes a habit of so doing, is not the man who sees and forgets. He puts that law into practice and he wins true happiness” ( James 1:25 PHILLIPS). Listen to the lover of your soul. Don’t just nod your head, pretending to hear. Your date knows when you’re engaged.

So does God. Just as you wouldn’t miss your date with a loved one, claiming you were too busy, make sure your date with God is on the calendar, and do everything in your power to keep it special.

NEW Book!
MAX ON LIFE: Answers and Insights to your Most Important Questions
Copyright (Thomas Nelson, 2011) Max Lucado

'Koinonia'—A Missing Ingredient in Today’s Church

  J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones

A small congregation in Puerto Rico reminded me that we can’t build 
the New Testament church without supernatural love.

Last week I preached for several days at Casa del Padre, a small but growing church near San Juan, Puerto Rico. The congregation meets in a rented facility with tile floors and folding chairs. They don’t have a worship leader yet, so a CD player provides accompaniment for the singing. The pastor, a gentle guy named Luis, keeps a second job to pay his family’s bills. Up until a few weeks ago, the church’s office was in his garage.

Casa del Padre is not a fancy place. But the church’s lack of sophistication is overshadowed by an amazing level of love. When I ministered on Sunday morning, the meeting began at 10:30 a.m. yet I didn’t leave the building until 5 p.m.—not because I preached too long but because nobody wanted to go home.

“We must return to koinonia—but you can’t download it. There’s no app for it, and you can’t fake it. We will have to scrap artificial, event-driven programs if we want to return to the relational Christianity of the Book of Acts.”

Resolving Conflicts: Part 2

continued from here

You will never resolve conflicts if you don't learn to listen.
Many people think they are listening when in fact they are simply reloading their verbal guns. Listening means seeking to understand what the other person is thinking and feeling. It is putting ourselves in the other person's shoes and trying to look at the world through their eyes.

Here's a good sentence with which to begin. "I want to understand what you are saying because I know it is important." One man told me that he made a sign which read: "I am a Listener." When his wife started talking he would hang it around his neck to remind himself of what he was doing. His wife would smile and say, "I hope it's true." He learned to be a good listener.

Can you hear me now?
We are all busy. Often, too busy to listen. And yet, listening is the only way you will ever come to understand your spouse's thoughts and feelings. Listening takes time and requires focus. Many people pride themselves in being able to listen while reading e-mails or watching television. One husband said, "my wife insists that I sit down and listen to her. I feel like I'm in a straitjacket, like I'm wasting time."

When you drop everything, look at your spouse and listen, you communicate, "You are the most important person in my life." On the other hand, when you listen while doing other things, you communicate: "You are one of my many interests." Listening is a powerful expression of love.

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It’s Dangerous for Men to "Follow Their Feelings"

by Mark Gungor

Maleness is under attack in this country and has been for the past 40 plus years. This is true in the culture at large, as well as in The Church, and it is extremely detrimental to male culture and our society at large. For a few years now people have been addressing this issue in books like The Feminization of American Culture by Ann Douglas, and David Murrow’s Why Men Hate Going to Church. The results of this feminization have been disastrous. Men are not real men anymore. Many males themselves don’t even know what it means to be a man because they have no role models. Part of this is due to the fact, that far too many fathers have literally abandoned their children or they are not engaged playing an active role in being a part of their son’s lives. For decades since the industrial revolution, most boys have been surrounded and raised by women who are the caretakers and role models. The message men are getting in spades—consciously and unconsciously– is that they need to be more like women and less like men.

The Character of Punctuality - 2/2

 continued from here

Many people consider Punctuality not worth the effort of study and practice. We live in a time when we are slaves to the urgency of schedules and appointments, where our meetings and outings dictate our use of time, and even our relationships. We over-commit and over-schedule, and do not give it a second glance. Yet, time is important, and our management of time will give others a glimpse of our priorities and character.

Remember, God considers punctuality important. Just look up, “at the appointed time,” in a concordance and see how many passages you find where God is concerned with our being on time. We may not see being timely as important, but God does! We are on this earth for such a short amount of time—compared with eternity—and we need to make the most of our time and opportunities. When we are careless with time, we hold others up, and miss valuable opportunities. Our time is a treasure that is given to us, and we are responsible to dish it out, fairly, in a clear and concise way—to the best of our ability, and accordingly to the situation.

Worship Team 1 May 2011

Chairperson: Dr. Siow KW

Worship Leader: Peter Long
Vocalists: Shankar R., Peggy Tan, Gigi Lim

Pianist: Jonathan L
Keyboardist: Meng Fhui
Guitarist: Weng Ern
Bassist: Darren
Drummer: Jaemy C

Projectionist: Joseph Yap

PA Personnel: Hiew FF, Tommy Q.

Sunday Sermon 24-April-2011 - Pastor David Chan

Speaker: Pastor David Chan
Itinerant Speaker

http://www.mediafire.com/?dr0kx8zn1hu8u7o

Mary Magdalene at Jesus' Tomb

by Max Lucado

Mary had been there. She had heard the leaders clamor for Jesus’ blood. She had witnessed the Roman whip rip the skin off his back. She had winced as the thorns sliced his brow and wept at the weight of the cross.

In the Louvre there is a painting of the scene of the cross. In the painting the stars are dead and the world is wrapped in darkness. In the shadows there is a kneeling form. It is Mary. She is holding her hands and lips against the bleeding feet of the Christ.

We don’t know if Mary did that, but we know she could have. She was there. She was there to hold her arm around the shoulder of Mary the mother of Jesus. She was there to close his eyes. She was there.

So it’s not surprising that she wants to be there again.

Resolving Conflicts: Part 1

What's so bad about arguing?
First, let me clarify what I mean by the word argue. It is a legal term. In a court of law attorneys make arguments designed to show the guilt or innocence of their client. They present the 'facts' with the attitude, "Any reasonable person would agree with my argument."

What works fairly well in the court room, works poorly in a marriage, because there is no judge available to determine when your spouse is 'out of order'. Arguments become charged with emotion and you end up yelling, screaming, or crying. Each feels the other is unreasonable. What's so bad about arguing? It turns spouses into enemies who have feelings of hurt, anger, and resentment.

Jesus Can Redeem Your Denials

J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones

Peter’s three denials could have marked the end of his ministry. 

But the power of Christ’s forgiveness led to three great victories.

The Easter story is full of gloom. Agonizing prayers in the Garden of Gethsemane. Hostile mobs demanding execution. Betrayal and beatings. A crown of thorns and a bloody cross.

But one of the saddest parts of the story, to me, is what happened to Peter the night Jesus was arrested. Peter was tired, stressed to the breaking point and fearful of the crowd. When the high priest’s servant girl accused him of being a disciple of Jesus, he denied it. When she repeated her accusation to some bystanders, he denied it again. When others questioned him, the Bible says Peter “began to curse and swear, ‘I do not know this man you are talking about!’” (Mark 14:71, NASB)

“This Easter, please remember that after Peter wept in the darkness of his shame, the sun came up and Jesus lovingly restored his faith. He will do the same for you.”

The Character of Punctuality - 1/2

By Dr. Richard J. Krejcir
Here is how you can find out. Take a careful look at this character, this fruit of Punctuality, from God’s most precious Word, by examining the passages below. Now ask yourself:

• How do I exhibit Punctuality in my daily life?
• What can I do to develop a better willingness to be on time, to show that I value people?
• What blocks Punctuality from working and being exhibited in me?
• How can I make Punctuality function better, stronger, and faster, even in times of uncertainly and stress?

Here are positive examples from Scripture 

(1 Kings 19:20-21; Matthew 25:1-13; Esther 4: 9-14; Luke 2:1-12)

Here are negative examples from Scripture 

(Exodus 8:10-11; Matthew 24:48-51; 25:1-13; Luke 9:60-62; Acts 24:24-26)

Worship Team 24 Apr 2011

Chairperson: Liong KC

Worship Leader: Kai Yew
Vocalists: Siew Pin, Hong Lu, Foong Yee

Pianist: Jocelyn Lee
Keyboardist: Jacinta Lee
Guitarist: Anna Sim
Bassist: Ken Fhui
Drummer: Darren

Projectionist: Terry C.

PA Personnel: Tommy Q., Manjit Singh

Sunday Sermon 17-April-2011 - Bro. Caleb Ramachandran

Speaker: Bro. Caleb Ramachandran
White Fields Assembly Seremban

http://www.mediafire.com/?f79ahr2c4kjmxxm

God's Promises in PSALM 23

The Lord is my Shepherd = That's Relationship!
I shall not want = That's Supply!
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures = That's Rest!
He leadeth me beside the still waters = That's Refreshment!

He restoreth my soul = That's Healing!
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness = That's Guidance!
For His name sake = That's Purpose!
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death = That's Testing!

I will fear no evil = That's Protection!
For Thou art with me = That's Faithfulness!
Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me = That's Discipline!
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies = That's Hope!

Thou annointest my head with oil = That's Consecration!
My cup runneth over = That's Abundance!
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life = That's Blessing!
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord = That's Security!

Forever = That's Eternity!

The Centurion at the Foot of the Cross

by Max Lucado

The day began as had a hundred others—dreadfully. It was bad enough to be in Judea, but it was hell to spend hot afternoons on a rocky hill supervising the death of pickpockets and rabble-rousers. Half the crowd taunted, half cried. The soldiers griped. The priests bossed. It was a thankless job in a strange land. He was ready for the day to be over before it began.

He was curious at the attention given to the flatfooted peasant. He smiled as he read the sign that would go on the cross. The condemned looked like anything but a king. His face was lumpy and bruised. His back arched slightly and his eyes faced downward. “Some harmless hick,” mused the centurion. “What could he have done?”

Then Jesus raised his head. He wasn’t angry. He wasn’t uneasy. His eyes were strangely calm as they stared from behind the bloody mask. He looked at those who knew him—moving deliberately from face to face as if he had a word for each.

Getting the Weirdness Out of the Prophetic Movement

J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones

Let’s reclaim the simple, profound purpose of prophecy—and reject all sensational substitutes.

When I was a college student, a visiting minister regularly came to preach at our campus meetings. At the end of his messages he would often point at someone in the room, smile and say something like, “You in the blue shirt, I believe the Lord has a word of encouragement for you.” Then he would prophesy.

This freaked me out! How could this man know what God was saying to someone else? What if he was wrong? I loved the gift of prophecy because I had benefitted from it myself. But I remember telling the Lord back in those days that I would never, ever stand in front of a group and prophesy to an individual like that. Way too scary!

“If we focus on spiritual gifts as an end in themselves, our distraction will lead us into deception of the weirdest kind. Let’s get our eyes back on Jesus.”

Worship Team Roster 10-April to 19-Jun 2011

Roster can be viewed HERE

Hugs=Happier Marriage

by Mark Gungor


A recent poll of 4000 couples found that those spouses who described themselves as “very happy” tended to hug one another at least four times a day. Science has found many direct correlations between human touch and physical health…and I’m not even talking about actual sexual intercourse! Just holding hands, hugs, a pat on the back, a hand on the arm or other touches like this have a great impact on our mental wellness, our health and the state of our relationships.

Studies have shown that people who don’t have physical touch don’t fair as well, single people, who generally don’t get as much physical touch, have more health problems, and babies in ICUs and people with chronic health conditions who get touched more heal faster and fair better. We are not designed to be people who are never touched or held. We really do need to have it. See the following article on the connection between touch and the release of oxytocin.

Worship Team 17 Apr 2011

Chairperson: Caleb R.

Worship Leader: Peggy Tan
Vocalists: Gigi Lim, Joycelyn C., Lydia Sim

Pianist: Prisca Sim
Keyboardist: Meng Fhui
Guitarist: Terry C.
Bassist: Nigel
Drummer: Anna Sim

Projectionist: Moses Tan

PA Personnel: Hiew FF, Tommy Q

Sunday Sermon 10-April-2011 - Dr. Siow Kim Woon

Speaker: Dr Siow Kim Woon
White Fields Assembly Seremban

http://www.mediafire.com/?hmkw3p86d97ngah

Thirsty on the Cross

by Max Lucado

Jesus’ final act on earth was intended to win your trust.

This is the final act of Jesus’ life. In the concluding measure of his earthly composition, we hear the sounds of a thirsty man.

And through his thirst—through a sponge and a jar of cheap wine—he leaves a final appeal.

“You can trust me.”

Jesus. Lips cracked and mouth of cotton. Throat so dry he couldn’t swallow, and voice so hoarse he could scarcely speak. He is thirsty. To find the last time moisture touched these lips you need to rewind a dozen hours to the meal in the upper room. Since tasting that cup of wine, Jesus has been beaten, spat upon, bruised, and cut. He has been a cross-carrier and sin-bearer, and no liquid has salved his throat. He is thirsty.

A Sweet Surprise Is Hidden Inside Your Worst Trial

J. Lee Grady

Before you whine, complain or throw a pity party, 

remember that God can bring something good out of something bad.

I’m usually adventurous when it comes to foreign food. But I was leery when I learned about a tropical fruit called durian during a trip to Indonesia. Three things made me highly suspicious of this strange delicacy, which is sold in large quantities on the streets of Jakarta.

First of all, durian looks absolutely deadly. Each of the large, round fruits is covered with massive thorns that stick out four inches or more. I’m sure if you threw one of these things at somebody from a second-story window the victim would die instantly.

“Praise God even when everything in your flesh wants to quit. Be patient. When you rejoice in adversity, the bitterness of life is replaced by the fragrance of Christ.”

Accepting the Past and Changing the Future

You Can't Change Your History
The prophet Jeremiah asked: "Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard his spots?" (Jeremiah 13:23). The obvious answer is 'no'. Some things are unchangeable. Perhaps the most influential unchangeable factor in your life is your history. Your parents, good or bad, dead or alive, known or unknown, are your parents. That fact cannot be changed. Your childhood, pleasant or painful, is your childhood.

Our history is not to be changed, but accepted. We waste our time and energy when we ponder on what might have been. Admit your failures, accept the failures of others, and ask God to help you do something good with your future. No matter what has happened in the past, you can have good relationships in the future.

An Everyday Opportunity
What kind of person have you become through the years? Has your spirit been negative or positive toward life? One wife said, "My husband is so negative that when he wakes up in the morning he either says, "Oh, no, I over slept!" or, "Oh, no, I woke up too early!" Thousands of people choose to live life with just that attitude. Something is always wrong with everything.

Would you like to change? You can! Repeat this scripture aloud every morning: "This is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24. If you proclaim this truth to yourself, you will begin to see God's hand. And, your relationships will improve.


Share your questions, thoughts insights, or comments by joining the conversation on Facebook at facebook.com/5lovelanguages

God's Delays Are Not Denials

J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones

Do you trust God's timing? 

The path to spiritual maturity requires us to surrender our selfish deadlines.

When Mary and Martha sent news to Jesus that their brother, Lazarus, was about to die, Jesus didn't respond the way his friends expected. He actually snubbed their request. The Bible says when Jesus heard that Lazarus was sick, "He then stayed two days longer in the place where He was" (John 11:6, NASB).

For Mary and Martha, those were two very long days.

"When we face frustrating delays, we automatically assume that Jesus is denying us, neglecting us or rejecting us. So we throw a childish pity party. We go in our rooms, close our doors, shut out the pain and stay as far away from Him as possible.”

Worship Team 10 Apr 2011

Chairperson: Barnabas P.

Worship Leader: Shankar R.
Vocalists: Siew Pin, Hong Lu, Foong Yee

Pianist: Meng Fhui
Synt: Jonathan L
Guitarist: Ken Fhui
Bassist: Darren
Drummer: Jaemy C

Projectionist: Joseph Yap

PA Personnel: Manjit Singh, Tommy Q.

How We Short-Circuit the Power of God

J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones

We can't have New Testament power if we don't walk in New Testament love

The New Testament church was characterized by exciting miracles and supernatural anointing, but it was not immune to division. The earliest churches suffered splits—not only because of doctrine but also because of bitter personal disputes.

Even the apostle Paul, who modeled Christian affection and implored his followers to preserve the bond of love, had an unfortunate disagreement with his close colleague, Barnabas, early in their ministry partnership.

The exact nature of their argument is a mystery. We only know that Paul did not want to take John Mark, Barnabas' cousin, on his second missionary journey because the young disciple had deserted the team in Pamphylia. Acts 15:39 says: "And there occurred such a sharp disagreement that they separated from one another, and Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed to Cyprus. (NASB)"

“Many Christians nurse grudges for years; others collect offenses like packrats. Many people are wounded in one church and then move to another—carrying their resentment and bitterness with them.”

"Father, Forgive Them"

by Max Lucado

The dialogue that Friday morning was bitter.

From the onlookers, “Come down from the cross if you are the Son of God!”
From the religious leaders, “He saved others but he can’t save himself.”
From the soldiers, “If you are the king of the Jews, save yourself.”

Bitter words. Acidic with sarcasm. Hateful. Irreverent. Wasn’t it enough that he was being crucified? Wasn’t it enough that he was being shamed as a criminal? Were the nails insufficient? Was the crown of thorns too soft? Had the flogging been too short?

For some, apparently so...

Of all the scenes around the cross, this one angers me the most. What kind of people, I ask myself, would mock a dying man? Who would be so base as to pour the salt of scorn upon open wounds? How low and perverted to sneer at one who is laced with pain…

Two Extremes of Self-Esteem

Inferiority
Most of us tend to either under-estimate or over-estimate our value. We perceive ourselves as either useless failures or as God's gift to the world. How you perceive yourself greatly affects your relationships. Inferiority often stems from childhood where parents told us that we were dumb, ugly, or clumsy.

How do we overcome feelings of being inferior? Speak truth to your heart. What is the truth? You are made in the image of God. You have a mind, emotions, and the ability to make decisions. You are gifted by God with special abilities. You have a unique role to play in his kingdom. No one else can take your place. Tell yourself the truth and behave accordingly. Then, watch your relationships flourish.

Superiority
Feelings of superiority often lead to broken relationships. It all began in childhood. Few rules were enforced. The child grew up feeling the world owed him a living. He became demanding and impatient with others. As an adult he is domineering and self-righteous. If there are problems in the relationship, he blames the other person.

The first step to recovery for the "I am superior" personality, is to admit that you are human. No one is perfect, so stop playing games. Step down from your pedestal and join the rest of us. You don't have to be perfect to be important. People will respect you more if you will admit your weaknesses. In fact, you will find that confession is the road to good relationships.


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