Speaker: Bro. Patrick Cheng
Executive Director, National Association of Christian Counsellors
http://www.mediafire.com/?4zof65tfo92xwvf
Executive Director, National Association of Christian Counsellors
http://www.mediafire.com/?4zof65tfo92xwvf
Sunday, 30 June 2013
Friday, 28 June 2013
God Hates Arrogance
Proverbs 16:18 reminds us as humility goes before honor, “pride goes before a fall.”
Ever wonder why churches are powerful in one generation but empty the next? The Bible says, the Lord will tear down the house of the proud. God hates arrogance. He hates it because we haven’t done anything to be arrogant about. Is there a Pulitzer for ink? Can you imagine a scalpel growing smug after a successful heart transplant? Of course not. They are only tools. So are we. We may be the canvas, the paper, or the scalpel, but we are not the one who deserve the applause.
David declares who does in Psalm 23, “He makes me, He leads me, He restores my soul…for His name’s sake.” For His name’s sake! No other name. This is all done for God’s glory. He takes the credit, not because He needs it, but because He knows we cannot handle it!
From Traveling Light
Ever wonder why churches are powerful in one generation but empty the next? The Bible says, the Lord will tear down the house of the proud. God hates arrogance. He hates it because we haven’t done anything to be arrogant about. Is there a Pulitzer for ink? Can you imagine a scalpel growing smug after a successful heart transplant? Of course not. They are only tools. So are we. We may be the canvas, the paper, or the scalpel, but we are not the one who deserve the applause.
David declares who does in Psalm 23, “He makes me, He leads me, He restores my soul…for His name’s sake.” For His name’s sake! No other name. This is all done for God’s glory. He takes the credit, not because He needs it, but because He knows we cannot handle it!
From Traveling Light
Practically Speaking - June 28, 2013
Words Of Affirmation
When on vacation, many people enjoy visiting the ocean or a beach of some sort. As you frolic in near the water, take advantage of the wet sand to write fun, playful, and/or loving words to those you love. Creation never looked so good!
When on vacation, many people enjoy visiting the ocean or a beach of some sort. As you frolic in near the water, take advantage of the wet sand to write fun, playful, and/or loving words to those you love. Creation never looked so good!
Acts Of Service
Airports can be stressful and nerve racking on your way to a vacation destination. Relieve some of the burden by offering to carry the bags of someone you love.
Receiving Gifts
Most people enjoy receiving small gifts from someone who travels. During your vacation, take some time in the shops to think of those you love and pick up a small gift to let them know you were thinking about them.
Most people enjoy receiving small gifts from someone who travels. During your vacation, take some time in the shops to think of those you love and pick up a small gift to let them know you were thinking about them.
Quality Time
What better way to spend quality time than to take a vacation with those you love?! During your trip be intentional to explore each others feelings, dreams, goals, and perspectives. Ask questions and then really listen. Turn off the phone and be in the moment with those you love.
Physical Touch
If your spouse's primary love language is physical touch, vacations can be a blast! Holding hands in the thrill of the moment on a roller coaster ride. Applying sun tan lotion near the pool. Getting playful in the ocean. Holding hands at a romantic cafe.
If your spouse's primary love language is physical touch, vacations can be a blast! Holding hands in the thrill of the moment on a roller coaster ride. Applying sun tan lotion near the pool. Getting playful in the ocean. Holding hands at a romantic cafe.
Thursday, 27 June 2013
Suitcases of Guilt
Do you carry a load of guilt? So many do. If our spiritual baggage were visible, you know what you’d see? Suitcases of guilt, bulging with binges, blowups, and compromises. The kid with the baggy jeans and nose ring? He’d give anything to retract the words he said to his mother. But he can’t. So he tows them along. The woman in the business suit that looks like she could run for Senator? She can’t run at all. Not hauling that carpet bag wherever she goes. So what do we do?
In Psalm 23:3 David said it like this, “He leads me in the paths of righteousness.” The path of righteousness is a narrow, winding trail up a steep hill. At the top is a cross. At the base of the cross are bags, countless bags full of innumerable sins. Calvary is the compost pile for guilt. Would you like to leave yours there as well?
From Traveling Light
In Psalm 23:3 David said it like this, “He leads me in the paths of righteousness.” The path of righteousness is a narrow, winding trail up a steep hill. At the top is a cross. At the base of the cross are bags, countless bags full of innumerable sins. Calvary is the compost pile for guilt. Would you like to leave yours there as well?
From Traveling Light
Wednesday, 26 June 2013
Where Does My Help Come From?
David said in Psalm 121, “I lift up my eyes to the hills—where does my help come from?” And David answers his own question, “My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip, He who watches over you will not slumber. The Lord watches over you. The Lord will keep you from all harm, He will watch over your life.”
God—your rescuer, has the right vision. He also has the right direction. He made the boldest claim in the history of man when He declared, “I am the way.” People wondered if the claim was accurate. He answered their question by forging a path through the underbrush of sin and death—escaping alive.
Maybe you need your hope restored. If so, lift up your eyes. Like David said, look unto the hills…look unto the One who made you and He will give you help.
From Traveling Light
God—your rescuer, has the right vision. He also has the right direction. He made the boldest claim in the history of man when He declared, “I am the way.” People wondered if the claim was accurate. He answered their question by forging a path through the underbrush of sin and death—escaping alive.
Maybe you need your hope restored. If so, lift up your eyes. Like David said, look unto the hills…look unto the One who made you and He will give you help.
From Traveling Light
A Response to Exodus: Don’t Apologize for the Truth
I agree with Alan Chambers that some Christians have been hateful toward the LGBT community. But we can’t change God’s Word to please people.
Two weeks ago at a church in Pennsylvania, a young man came to me seeking prayer. I’ll call him Enrique. He needed to make an honest confession. He admitted to me he had been experimenting with gay sex with two different guys.
The Holy Spirit had convicted Enrique that his behavior was wrong. His eyes were moist with tears as he bared his soul. He said he didn’t want to live in a homosexual lifestyle. He wanted help. I could have offered my new friend three very different responses:
1. Harsh judgment. I could have stepped back, scowled with disgust (“You did what? That’s sick!”) and told Enrique homosexuals go to hell—leaving him feeling condemned and without hope.
2. Lenient sympathy. I could have told Enrique not to feel guilty. I could have affirmed his behavior by saying, “Lots of people have same-sex attraction. Some are born that way. If you are attracted to men, just explore your sexuality. God loves you just the way you are.”
Two weeks ago at a church in Pennsylvania, a young man came to me seeking prayer. I’ll call him Enrique. He needed to make an honest confession. He admitted to me he had been experimenting with gay sex with two different guys.
The Holy Spirit had convicted Enrique that his behavior was wrong. His eyes were moist with tears as he bared his soul. He said he didn’t want to live in a homosexual lifestyle. He wanted help. I could have offered my new friend three very different responses:
1. Harsh judgment. I could have stepped back, scowled with disgust (“You did what? That’s sick!”) and told Enrique homosexuals go to hell—leaving him feeling condemned and without hope.
2. Lenient sympathy. I could have told Enrique not to feel guilty. I could have affirmed his behavior by saying, “Lots of people have same-sex attraction. Some are born that way. If you are attracted to men, just explore your sexuality. God loves you just the way you are.”
Monday, 24 June 2013
You Have Hope
For many, hope is in short supply. Hopelessness is an odd bag. Unlike others, it isn’t full. It’s empty, and its emptiness creates the burden. Unzip the top and examine all the pockets. Turn it upside down and shake it hard. The bag of hopelessness is painfully empty! Not a very pretty picture, is it? What would it take to restore your hope? One comes quickly to mind…a person. Not just any person. You need someone to look you in the face and say, “This isn’t the end. Don’t give up. There’s a better place than this. And I’ll lead you there.”
David, in Psalm 23, used these words, “He restores my soul.” God majors in restoring hope to the soul. Please note that you always have hope! Psalm 121:7 says, “The Lord will keep you from all harm—He will watch over your life.” He’s the perfect one to do so!
From Traveling Light
David, in Psalm 23, used these words, “He restores my soul.” God majors in restoring hope to the soul. Please note that you always have hope! Psalm 121:7 says, “The Lord will keep you from all harm—He will watch over your life.” He’s the perfect one to do so!
From Traveling Light
Sunday, 23 June 2013
Sunday Sermon - 23-June-2013 - Dr Steven Yee
Speaker: Dr. Steven Yee
Senior Pastor, Covenant Community Life Centre, Kuala Lumpur.
http://www.mediafire.com/?bx1pkv3lszbe8dx
Senior Pastor, Covenant Community Life Centre, Kuala Lumpur.
http://www.mediafire.com/?bx1pkv3lszbe8dx
Saturday, 22 June 2013
Worship Team Roster for 14-July-2013 to 29-Sept-2013
Worship team roster for 14-July-2013 to 29-Sept-2013
https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B8Jpi4mt0DUTUktzY2xYRkFGV00/edit?usp=sharing
https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B8Jpi4mt0DUTUktzY2xYRkFGV00/edit?usp=sharing
Friday, 21 June 2013
One Step is Enough
Arthur Hays Sulzberger was the publisher of the New York Times during the Second World War. Because of all the world conflict, he found it almost impossible to sleep. He was never able to set aside worries from his mind—until he adopted as his motto these five words, “one step enough for me.” He took it from the old hymn, “Lead Kindly Light.”
Lead, kindly light. . .
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene; one step enough for me.
God isn’t going to let you see the distant scene either. So you might as well quit looking for it. God does promise a lamp for our feet, not a crystal ball into the future. We don’t need to know what will happen tomorrow. We only need to know that Hebrews 4:16 promises “we will find grace to help us when we need it.”
From Traveling Light
Lead, kindly light. . .
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene; one step enough for me.
God isn’t going to let you see the distant scene either. So you might as well quit looking for it. God does promise a lamp for our feet, not a crystal ball into the future. We don’t need to know what will happen tomorrow. We only need to know that Hebrews 4:16 promises “we will find grace to help us when we need it.”
From Traveling Light
Practically Speaking (Childrens' Edition) - June 21, 2013
Words Of Affirmation
Write sticky notes of affirmation and stick them on the fridge, mirror, front door, and any where else your child will see. Describe not just what you appreciate about what they do, but who they are.
Write sticky notes of affirmation and stick them on the fridge, mirror, front door, and any where else your child will see. Describe not just what you appreciate about what they do, but who they are.
Acts Of Service
Children often have trouble keeping their room clean. This weekend, offer to help them clean their room or organize their clothes. Not only will it help then feel loved, it will give you some peace of mind.
Children often have trouble keeping their room clean. This weekend, offer to help them clean their room or organize their clothes. Not only will it help then feel loved, it will give you some peace of mind.
Receiving Gifts
Even if it isn't their primary love language, most kids enjoy gifts. Go to the local dollar store or candy shop. Pick out a handful of small items you think he/she will enjoy and give it to them at a special moment.
Even if it isn't their primary love language, most kids enjoy gifts. Go to the local dollar store or candy shop. Pick out a handful of small items you think he/she will enjoy and give it to them at a special moment.
Quality Time
Take some time out to turn off the phone and take your child to the park, play a video game together, talk, read a book, or go on a special outing together. Talk about whatever they want to talk about. Don't forget to really listen and pay close attention to what they have to say.
Take some time out to turn off the phone and take your child to the park, play a video game together, talk, read a book, or go on a special outing together. Talk about whatever they want to talk about. Don't forget to really listen and pay close attention to what they have to say.
Physical Touch
Spins, hugs, back scratches, tossing the hair all communicate love to a child whose primary love language is physical touch. Moms, paint your daughters toe nails. Dads, take your son to the park and play some basketball. Don't shy away from your child. Your appropriate touch makes them feel secure and loved.
Spins, hugs, back scratches, tossing the hair all communicate love to a child whose primary love language is physical touch. Moms, paint your daughters toe nails. Dads, take your son to the park and play some basketball. Don't shy away from your child. Your appropriate touch makes them feel secure and loved.
Commodity Marriages
In the last post, I spoke about living in a “throwaway” world and suggested that if we are not careful, we can end up thinking that way about our marriages too. We live in a culture that is very consumer based and the consumerist mind-set runs deep. Many people build their identities around the stuff they have…or it may be more apt to say, by what has them. If I run to the store to buy some simple dish soap, I can buy the inexpensive brand that sports the name “Dish Soap” on the front of the bottle. But just looking at the label Dish Soap makes me feel flat, empty, nondescript. So for some reason, I can’t settle for that. As a consumer, what I buy defines who I am, and I have no idea who I am if I buy something labeled “Dish Soap.” I need something more.
Then I see it! Right next to the unsophisticated Dish Soap is a product called “Dawn.” My heart lights up—now we’re talking. Who wants to wash their dishes with Dish Soap when you can wash them with morning-fresh, bright sunshine? Presumably with Dawn, a person can do the dishes and dispel the darkness in life at the same time.
Then I see it! Right next to the unsophisticated Dish Soap is a product called “Dawn.” My heart lights up—now we’re talking. Who wants to wash their dishes with Dish Soap when you can wash them with morning-fresh, bright sunshine? Presumably with Dawn, a person can do the dishes and dispel the darkness in life at the same time.
But just before I make my all-important decision, I look to the other side of the imagine-less, unfulfilling, chore-oriented Dish Soap. Alas, there is yet another amazing product possibility: “Joy.” Wow. Who would have thought that a person could experience joy while doing the dishes? And couldn’t all of us use just a little more joy? The Joy has it, hands-down. So what if it costs a little more, I muse. After all, aren’t I worth it?
Thursday, 20 June 2013
He Leads
Worrying is one job you can’t farm out, but you can overcome it. There’s no better place to begin than in Psalm 23:2. “He leads me beside the still waters,” David declares. “He leads me.” God isn’t behind me, yelling, “Go!” He’s ahead of me bidding, “Come!” He’s in front, clearing the path, cutting the brush. Standing next to the rocks, He warns, “Watch your step there.”
Isn’t this what God gave the children of Israel? He promised to supply them with manna each day. But He told them to collect only one day’s supply at a time. Matthew 6:34 says, “Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.”
God is leading you! Leave tomorrow’s problems until tomorrow!
From Traveling Light
Isn’t this what God gave the children of Israel? He promised to supply them with manna each day. But He told them to collect only one day’s supply at a time. Matthew 6:34 says, “Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.”
God is leading you! Leave tomorrow’s problems until tomorrow!
From Traveling Light
Wednesday, 19 June 2013
40 Years After Roe v. Wade: One Abortion Survivor’s Story
My friend Chris Foster could have been aborted. Today he is a trophy of God’s grace.
The Supreme Court legalized abortion in this country 40 years ago. That is an intensely personal issue for my friend Chris Foster, a pastor in Pennsylvania who happens to be 40 years old. He was born just three months before the Roe v. Wade case was decided.
Chris grew up in central New York in a troubled family. He sometimes struggled with his identity because his stepfather spoke about “adopting” him. Chris didn’t understand what that meant. Later, when he was 16, his sister told him during a fight he was a “bastard.” Chris got angry—and realized there were issues about his past that were being hidden from him.
Chris’ mom tried to change the subject when he asked about his sister’s cruel comment. But Chris was left with nagging doubts. Who was his biological father?
Chris began a personal relationship with Jesus when he was 17 and then headed to Bible college. But five years later, after he had married his wife, Amy, he learned the shocking truth about his conception: His mother had been raped by a drunken stranger while she was visiting some friends. The result was an unwanted pregnancy.
The Supreme Court legalized abortion in this country 40 years ago. That is an intensely personal issue for my friend Chris Foster, a pastor in Pennsylvania who happens to be 40 years old. He was born just three months before the Roe v. Wade case was decided.
Chris grew up in central New York in a troubled family. He sometimes struggled with his identity because his stepfather spoke about “adopting” him. Chris didn’t understand what that meant. Later, when he was 16, his sister told him during a fight he was a “bastard.” Chris got angry—and realized there were issues about his past that were being hidden from him.
Chris’ mom tried to change the subject when he asked about his sister’s cruel comment. But Chris was left with nagging doubts. Who was his biological father?
Chris began a personal relationship with Jesus when he was 17 and then headed to Bible college. But five years later, after he had married his wife, Amy, he learned the shocking truth about his conception: His mother had been raped by a drunken stranger while she was visiting some friends. The result was an unwanted pregnancy.
Sunday, 16 June 2013
Sunday Sermon - 16-June-2013 - Pr Ang Siew Khim
Speaker: Pastor Ang Siew Khim
River of Life Sanctuary, Kuala Lumpur.
http://www.mediafire.com/?cs6dcq5ytc4fq2l
River of Life Sanctuary, Kuala Lumpur.
http://www.mediafire.com/?cs6dcq5ytc4fq2l
Friday, 14 June 2013
Practically Speaking (Workplace Edition) - June 14, 2013
Words Of Affirmation
Words of Affirmation can easily be expressed in the workplace electronically—email, messaging, social media, or text. However, a hand-written note, card, or verbal affirmation may add a personal touch that feels a bit more meaningful to the recipient. Look for opportunities to give Words of Affirmation, not only for what people do, but for who they are.
Words of Affirmation can easily be expressed in the workplace electronically—email, messaging, social media, or text. However, a hand-written note, card, or verbal affirmation may add a personal touch that feels a bit more meaningful to the recipient. Look for opportunities to give Words of Affirmation, not only for what people do, but for who they are.
Acts Of Service
True leadership requires a willingness to serve others—either one's customers or colleagues. If there is someone who appears frustrated or overwhelmed at work, ask them if you can be of assistance. Have a good attitude and help the way they want you to help, not just the way you think you should help. This is achieved by clarifying exactly how they want you to help before you begin.
True leadership requires a willingness to serve others—either one's customers or colleagues. If there is someone who appears frustrated or overwhelmed at work, ask them if you can be of assistance. Have a good attitude and help the way they want you to help, not just the way you think you should help. This is achieved by clarifying exactly how they want you to help before you begin.
Receiving Gifts
Sometimes it's not only the face to face gifts that make a difference—it's that you were thinking others that means something to a Gifts person. Maybe it's a snack you bring in for everyone, some fresh coffee to replace the stale brew in the break room, or some gift cards you distribute around the office to a local bakery. Discover ways you can brighten someones day through small and unexpected gifts, and you will make the Giftie a very happy colleague.
Sometimes it's not only the face to face gifts that make a difference—it's that you were thinking others that means something to a Gifts person. Maybe it's a snack you bring in for everyone, some fresh coffee to replace the stale brew in the break room, or some gift cards you distribute around the office to a local bakery. Discover ways you can brighten someones day through small and unexpected gifts, and you will make the Giftie a very happy colleague.
Quality Time
In the workplace, Quality Timers feel valued when you spend time with them. Take them to lunch, stop by their office to chat, invite them to a sporting event, or give them a call just to see how they are doing. It's important to make sure when spending time together you are not just there physically, but emotionally as well. Your attention and attitude will make a significant difference in how authentic they perceive your gesture.
In the workplace, Quality Timers feel valued when you spend time with them. Take them to lunch, stop by their office to chat, invite them to a sporting event, or give them a call just to see how they are doing. It's important to make sure when spending time together you are not just there physically, but emotionally as well. Your attention and attitude will make a significant difference in how authentic they perceive your gesture.
Physical Touch
Appropriate is the key word. Appropriate Physical Touch can be a high five, handshake, pat on the back, or maybe even a fist bump. If you see a colleague who rarely expresses appreciation to others in these ways, you can safely assume that they probably wouldn't appreciate the gesture from you. Therefore, observe the people who are already expressing these types of gestures to others and mark them as those who would most likely appreciate a fist bump from you when the merger goes through.
Appropriate is the key word. Appropriate Physical Touch can be a high five, handshake, pat on the back, or maybe even a fist bump. If you see a colleague who rarely expresses appreciation to others in these ways, you can safely assume that they probably wouldn't appreciate the gesture from you. Therefore, observe the people who are already expressing these types of gestures to others and mark them as those who would most likely appreciate a fist bump from you when the merger goes through.
Wednesday, 12 June 2013
5 Lessons From the Stupidest Man in the Bible
If you want to be a good husband and father, avoid this guy’s bad example.
Who is the most brainless man in the Bible? We could make a long list of losers: Adam, Cain, Esau, Pharaoh, Saul, Ahab, Judas or Simon the Sorcerer. I love the fact that people’s mistakes aren’t whitewashed in the Scriptures. Even the holiest guys blew it (Peter comes to mind) but fortunately many of them found forgiveness and a second chance. That gives me hope every time I make a dumb mistake.
But there’s one guy who’s stupidity puts him in a class by himself—partly because he never even realized how spiritually clueless he was. When I was speaking to a group of leaders last week in Puerto Rico, I used Nabal as an example of how men shouldn’t act.
If we want to be good husbands and fathers, and if we want to disciple other men to do the same, we should take a cue from this Old Testament geezer whose name literally means “fool.” Here are five reasons I put Nabal in the “stupid” category:
Nabal didn’t honor God. Nabal was an entrepreneur and he built a prosperous business in sheep and goats. But the Bible says he was “harsh and evil in his dealings” (1 Sam. 25:3). He was the kind of guy no one really wants to be around: pompous, corrupt and selfish. When David came seeking food for his warriors, Nabal refused to help. He didn’t care about God’s kingdom because he was focused totally on building his own.
Who is the most brainless man in the Bible? We could make a long list of losers: Adam, Cain, Esau, Pharaoh, Saul, Ahab, Judas or Simon the Sorcerer. I love the fact that people’s mistakes aren’t whitewashed in the Scriptures. Even the holiest guys blew it (Peter comes to mind) but fortunately many of them found forgiveness and a second chance. That gives me hope every time I make a dumb mistake.
But there’s one guy who’s stupidity puts him in a class by himself—partly because he never even realized how spiritually clueless he was. When I was speaking to a group of leaders last week in Puerto Rico, I used Nabal as an example of how men shouldn’t act.
If we want to be good husbands and fathers, and if we want to disciple other men to do the same, we should take a cue from this Old Testament geezer whose name literally means “fool.” Here are five reasons I put Nabal in the “stupid” category:
Nabal didn’t honor God. Nabal was an entrepreneur and he built a prosperous business in sheep and goats. But the Bible says he was “harsh and evil in his dealings” (1 Sam. 25:3). He was the kind of guy no one really wants to be around: pompous, corrupt and selfish. When David came seeking food for his warriors, Nabal refused to help. He didn’t care about God’s kingdom because he was focused totally on building his own.
Sunday, 9 June 2013
Sunday Sermon - 9-June-2013 - Bro Caleb Ramachandran
Speaker: Bro. Caleb Ramachandran
White Fields Assembly Seremban
http://www.mediafire.com/?4ohazjkrzp1d1r1
White Fields Assembly Seremban
http://www.mediafire.com/?4ohazjkrzp1d1r1
Friday, 7 June 2013
Practically Speaking - June 7, 2013
Words Of Affirmation
My husband and I have the exact same love language. Why do we feel disconnected?
Many times, if a couple happens to have the same love languages, they have different dialects within those languages. So, you still think that what makes you feel loved makes them feel loved. The best way to handle that is to say to them, “Okay, so Words of Affirmation is your love language. It’s my love language too. What are the kinds of words that you like to hear from me? And where do you like to hear them? In private or in public?” So, find out something about the nuances of speaking their love language. That’s the key: learning to speak their language and their dialect of that language.
My husband and I have the exact same love language. Why do we feel disconnected?
Many times, if a couple happens to have the same love languages, they have different dialects within those languages. So, you still think that what makes you feel loved makes them feel loved. The best way to handle that is to say to them, “Okay, so Words of Affirmation is your love language. It’s my love language too. What are the kinds of words that you like to hear from me? And where do you like to hear them? In private or in public?” So, find out something about the nuances of speaking their love language. That’s the key: learning to speak their language and their dialect of that language.
Acts Of Service
How can I communicate my love language of acts of service to my husband when he is overseas for long periods of time?
Here’s what I suggest, if your husband’s love language is acts of service and he is overseas and, consequently you can’t do acts of service for him physically, then in your emails or phone calls to him you say, “I just want to let you know, I’ve been loving you today. I took the garbage out, mowed the grass, mopped the floor…” Tell him the things you do for him that he appreciates, that when you do those things you’re thinking about him and about how much you love him. He’ll get it and emotionally he will feel your love.
How can I communicate my love language of acts of service to my husband when he is overseas for long periods of time?
Here’s what I suggest, if your husband’s love language is acts of service and he is overseas and, consequently you can’t do acts of service for him physically, then in your emails or phone calls to him you say, “I just want to let you know, I’ve been loving you today. I took the garbage out, mowed the grass, mopped the floor…” Tell him the things you do for him that he appreciates, that when you do those things you’re thinking about him and about how much you love him. He’ll get it and emotionally he will feel your love.
Receiving Gifts
My daughter is dating a guy whose love language is Receiving Gifts. However, she is on a very tight budget. How would she show this?
Don’t assume that because a person’s love language is Receiving Gifts that you have to give expensive gifts. That’s not true. If gifts is a person’s love language, then little gifts will mean just as much as large and expensive gifts. They know if you’re on a budget and if you don’t have a lot of extra funds around. So simply buying a piece of candy or something else small, it says to them, “they were thinking about me, they got this for me.”
So it doesn’t have to be an expensive gift, it’s the thought that counts. But don’t ignore the reality that their love language is “Receiving Gifts.” Give them gifts but stay within your budget.
My daughter is dating a guy whose love language is Receiving Gifts. However, she is on a very tight budget. How would she show this?
Don’t assume that because a person’s love language is Receiving Gifts that you have to give expensive gifts. That’s not true. If gifts is a person’s love language, then little gifts will mean just as much as large and expensive gifts. They know if you’re on a budget and if you don’t have a lot of extra funds around. So simply buying a piece of candy or something else small, it says to them, “they were thinking about me, they got this for me.”
So it doesn’t have to be an expensive gift, it’s the thought that counts. But don’t ignore the reality that their love language is “Receiving Gifts.” Give them gifts but stay within your budget.
Quality Time
My wife and I are both active duty Marines, and we spend a lot off time away from each other. How do we start talking when we know one of us will be leaving soon?
I think one of the ways you prepare yourself for the separation is to talk with each other about some of the things that you really enjoyed during the time you were together. And then to ask the other person: What are some things I can do while you’re away that would be helpful to you to have done while I’m gone?
I think another factor is to say to them, “how can we stay in touch while we’re away?” And the good news is, for example, the love languages can be spoken long distance by emails or phone calls or letters. But talking about that before you go can set the stage for your actually speaking love long distance.
My wife and I are both active duty Marines, and we spend a lot off time away from each other. How do we start talking when we know one of us will be leaving soon?
I think one of the ways you prepare yourself for the separation is to talk with each other about some of the things that you really enjoyed during the time you were together. And then to ask the other person: What are some things I can do while you’re away that would be helpful to you to have done while I’m gone?
I think another factor is to say to them, “how can we stay in touch while we’re away?” And the good news is, for example, the love languages can be spoken long distance by emails or phone calls or letters. But talking about that before you go can set the stage for your actually speaking love long distance.
Physical Touch
My husband got a zero for physical touch on your online quiz and I got a zero. How do I deal with it?
He must learn how to reach out and give you the kind of touches that communicate love to you—just as you must learn to speak his love language. It usually doesn’t come natural to speak a language that is not native to us, so it will be just as difficult for him as it is for you. But if you both understand how important this is—that this is what is going to make the other person feel loved—it makes learning to speak each other’s primary love language much easier. I deal with thoroughly in my book The 5 Love Languages, so if you’ve not yet read it and only taken the quiz, I want to encourage you do so. I would also recommend you get your husband the men’s edition because in it I give guys several additional ideas on how to speak all five languages.
Thursday, 6 June 2013
Cloth Diaper Marriages
When my kids were babies, we had cloth diapers. Disposable diapers were available at the time; we just couldn’t afford them. No, we did not indulge in those fancy throwaway diapers; we had the good ol’mess’em and clean’em later diapers. You put them in a diaper pail, a delightful little plastic container where a lovely, pungent brew of baby poopies would slowly stew until you got around to washing them so they could be reused. Now, don’t misunderstand me, I do not miss cloth diapers. God bless the person who invented the disposable diaper! (I know, I know, they are bad for the environment—landfills and all that—but cloth diapers were bad for the environment where I lived, so I welcomed the invention of throwaway diapers.) But I do have a problem with throwaway marriages—relationships that are tossed aside because they get some “poo” in them.
We need to develop some “cloth diaper” marriages—marriages that you stick with no matter how crappy they get. Relationships that you hold on to—yes, you need to learn how to wash and dry them, and maybe use some fabric softener to make them nicer to touch and smell—but you don’t toss them away. Sadly, what we have instead is a culture of quick, no-fault divorce that fosters throwaway marriages—disposable love. It’s amazing, but some folks hold on to their underwear longer than their sacred vows of matrimony, and they didn’t even pledge to the underwear, “Till death do us part.”
We live in a throwaway world. We throw away everything. When I was growing up, repair shops were not hard to find. Shoe repair, television repair, appliance repair, and watch repair ships were commonplace. Today that isn’t true. When was the last time you had a pair of shoes fixed? Who repairs torn socks anymore? Unless you have an expensive watch, you just throw away the one you have when it quits working. We throw away everything today—even the things that should never be thrown away, things that are designed to last for a lifetime, like marriages.
We need to develop some “cloth diaper” marriages—marriages that you stick with no matter how crappy they get. Relationships that you hold on to—yes, you need to learn how to wash and dry them, and maybe use some fabric softener to make them nicer to touch and smell—but you don’t toss them away. Sadly, what we have instead is a culture of quick, no-fault divorce that fosters throwaway marriages—disposable love. It’s amazing, but some folks hold on to their underwear longer than their sacred vows of matrimony, and they didn’t even pledge to the underwear, “Till death do us part.”
We live in a throwaway world. We throw away everything. When I was growing up, repair shops were not hard to find. Shoe repair, television repair, appliance repair, and watch repair ships were commonplace. Today that isn’t true. When was the last time you had a pair of shoes fixed? Who repairs torn socks anymore? Unless you have an expensive watch, you just throw away the one you have when it quits working. We throw away everything today—even the things that should never be thrown away, things that are designed to last for a lifetime, like marriages.
Wednesday, 5 June 2013
How I Know David and Jonathan Weren’t Gay
Some “theologians” today are perverting Bible stories to promote their agenda. We can’t let them hijack the gospel.
A few weeks ago when I addressed the topic of homosexuality, a reader posted a comment on our forum suggesting that the biblical King David and his friend Jonathan were gay lovers. After a few other readers questioned this interpretation, another reader repeated the claim. “The Bible is clear that David and Jonathan were physical, sexual, gay male homosexual lovers,” this person wrote authoritatively—without citing a chapter and verse.
Most evangelical Christians would drop their jaws in bewilderment if confronted with such an odd theory. Even people with minimal knowledge of the Old Testament know that (1) David was married to Jonathan’s sister, Michal—and he had a few other wives, and (2) David’s biggest blunder was his adulterous relationship with Bathsheba—a woman he saw bathing on a rooftop. God was not happy about David’s lust or with his decision to have Bathsheba’s husband killed so he could hide his sin.
It is illogical to read homosexuality into the story of David and Jonathan because neither Jewish nor early Christian tradition ever endorses sex outside the bounds of heterosexual marriage. If you read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation, you will never see a depiction of a gay relationship, ever. Nor will you see homosexuality affirmed. You cannot get around the fact that the Bible says gay sex is flat-out wrong.
A few weeks ago when I addressed the topic of homosexuality, a reader posted a comment on our forum suggesting that the biblical King David and his friend Jonathan were gay lovers. After a few other readers questioned this interpretation, another reader repeated the claim. “The Bible is clear that David and Jonathan were physical, sexual, gay male homosexual lovers,” this person wrote authoritatively—without citing a chapter and verse.
Most evangelical Christians would drop their jaws in bewilderment if confronted with such an odd theory. Even people with minimal knowledge of the Old Testament know that (1) David was married to Jonathan’s sister, Michal—and he had a few other wives, and (2) David’s biggest blunder was his adulterous relationship with Bathsheba—a woman he saw bathing on a rooftop. God was not happy about David’s lust or with his decision to have Bathsheba’s husband killed so he could hide his sin.
It is illogical to read homosexuality into the story of David and Jonathan because neither Jewish nor early Christian tradition ever endorses sex outside the bounds of heterosexual marriage. If you read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation, you will never see a depiction of a gay relationship, ever. Nor will you see homosexuality affirmed. You cannot get around the fact that the Bible says gay sex is flat-out wrong.
Sunday, 2 June 2013
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