Song Story: I Will Sing

From Don
05.05.09

I wrote the title song for I Will Sing in my car and my first reaction was, “I don’t know where that came from, but I’ll never put it on a Hosanna! Music album!"

I had spent the day at one of Alabama’s gulf coast beaches, about an hour south of Integrity’s studios in Mobile, hoping to write songs for the upcoming album.

I didn't feel anything the entire day. It was one of those times when you wonder where God is. I was driving back home, feeling frustrated, and I said, “Lord, You seem so far away, a million miles or more it feels today.” It just popped out. Then I got another line: “And though I haven’t lost my faith, I must confess right now that it’s hard for me to pray.” The words kept coming, and I wrote the entire song right there in my car, but I didn’t like it. I thought, “What a waste! I need songs for the album; I don’t need this!”

I promptly filed the song away, thinking I’d never use it. Not long after, Integrity’s staff was stunned by the news that the ten-year-old daughter of David C. Reilly, a graphic artist who has designed album covers for Integrity Music for more than a decade, was killed in a car accident.

I remembered the song I had scribbled on a paper, so I recorded it on a CD and sent it to David with a note: “I know you’re going to have days when you feel like, 'Where in the world is God?' but I want to encourage you to sing. Don’t give up.”

The reality is that everyone goes through days when we feel God is far away. There’s a phoniness in Christian circles that says you don’t admit that. But look at Psalm 109. How could David, the sweet psalmist of Israel who said, 'I will bless the Lord at all times,' write these angry words? Because he was honest before the Lord, and that’s what God wants in our worship, too. He knows already, so I want to work on being honest, transparent with the Father, who delights in our hearts.

- Don